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Teen Poetry #5
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tish76
New Member
since 2001-07-18
Posts 3


0 posted 2001-07-18 05:32 PM


I feel like crying,
Though my eyes are dry.
I feel your heart,
Deep down inside.

You whispered sweet songs for me to hear.
You planted a rose, for me to smell.
Your song made my heart ache.
Your scented rose, made me smile.

The echo of your sweet laughter called my name.
You velvet touch, still on my face.
You wrote a poem, for me to read.
You told a joke, and made me laugh.

You began to cough, and it made me sad.
You closed your eyes, as your breathing slowed.
You look at me and whisper good-bye.
Your heartbeat became weak....so very weak.

My tears begin to fall.
My heart is full of pain.
Your last breath tells me,
"It's okay to cry."

Leticia Faye Albert
2-14-99



© Copyright 2001 tish76 - All Rights Reserved
Saxoness
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 1999-07-18
Posts 1102
Texas
1 posted 2001-07-18 06:00 PM


Oh my...this was so sad...I could feel your emotions really well coming through this.  
Thank you for sharing this with us,  and I'd like to be the first to welcome you to Passions in Poetry! Hope you stick around for awhile, we're all glad to have you  

"Glory remains unaware of my neglected dwelling where alone
I sing my tearful song which has charms only for me."
                                

keoni
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC
2 posted 2001-07-18 06:26 PM


Welcome to Passions! I hope you enjoy it here. This is a very sad poem. I am sorry for your loss. Writing a poem such as this one is a great way to hold on to the memory of the person. I think the poem is very nice. I hope you continue to post here.
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

Spice
Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.
3 posted 2001-07-18 06:47 PM


   WELCOME TO PIP!  
I thought you did very well on this piece, Tish. Such a sad poem. Your feelings and emotions came shining through. More I say!

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

4 posted 2001-07-19 01:48 AM


WELCOME TO PASSIONS!!...

sad...you wrote this nicely...your expression of this was well done...i enjoeyd the read...as i hope to see you read, share and reply more..bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
5 posted 2001-07-20 10:08 PM


Welcome to Passions!!

This gave me goosebumps and sent a chill through my body. That's not easily done. For a first piece you have done a very good job with it. The pain and the sadness was overwhelming.
Thanks for sharing this.

~AF~

Psychopathic chickens are plotting against me...

Kosetsu
Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 450
Alabama, USA
6 posted 2001-07-21 01:34 AM


Heya! Welcome to PIP.

I must say, this thing near brought me to tears. Such emotion...seems like there's a lot of poems like this posted very recently. This was just awesome. Keep it up.

-Kosetsu

"Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we die." - Shakespeare

Shygirl82
Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245
Ilinois
7 posted 2001-07-21 04:54 AM


First of all I would just like to welcome you to Passions...Its a great place to be.

Secondly your poem was just simply beautiful...so full of emotion and heartache. Thanks for sharing...I will looking forward till your next post!
Always,
~Nikki~

It takes only a minute to like someone, a hour to love someone, but a lifetime to forget them.

Jessica
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member
since 2001-06-28
Posts 350
South AL
8 posted 2001-07-21 04:57 AM


Welcome to PiP!!   Hope you like it as much as we do!!  

BTW ~ I loved your poem... Great job!

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
9 posted 2001-07-24 12:02 PM


Welcome to Passions! A real touching poem this was. I enjoyed this one! Hope to see you post in the future.
Check your e-mail for a special message!
Dopey_Dope/Moderator


I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

[This message has been edited by Dopey_Dope (edited 07-24-2001).]

DarkenedShadow
Member
since 2001-07-23
Posts 114
Kansas
10 posted 2001-07-24 01:59 PM


Hey that made me get one of those feelings in my heart when I read this. I feel anyone who can do that writing has talent and should show much more of it. /Nick/
chas
Member
since 2001-04-08
Posts 101
Lynn, ma
11 posted 2001-07-24 02:07 PM


this is very good, hope to read more...

@}---`----------

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