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knightlyshadows
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 791
obscured vision

0 posted 2001-07-16 02:03 PM

the tears slide down my cheeks
slowly creeping along their path
not knowing where they will lead
but not ceasing in their motions
everflowing as the pain doesn't subside
only hidden behind a sheltering wall
a blockade built to last for all time
yet the tears rise behind this dam
slowly but steadly they reach the top
no longer able to hold back the stream
the dam will break behind this force
unless i allow release from this constant
the tears slide down my cheeks
untill i stop their course

I am Gaudior
the shadow cast of valour
to cloak our vision
the remants of days long past
lay waking in the twilight

destiny502
Member

since 1999-11-23

Posts 57
OH

1 posted 2001-07-16 03:19 PM

I cry a lot..but usually i let it all build up and when i start to cry for one thing i end up crying for everything thats gone wrong and for things that i hope for. it makes me cry harder and longer.

Love can sometimes be like magic, but magic can sometimes..just be illusion

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

2 posted 2001-07-16 07:32 PM

I really liked this, Tiff.
I could relate so much.

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

3 posted 2001-07-16 09:27 PM

I relaly like this one, Tiff. Just remember that you can't be streong all the time. Crying doesn't mean that you're weak. Everyone needs to cry sometimes... It makes you stronger in the long run

Nice work on the poem... the free verse is awesome!! I really love reading free verse, and this poem flowed very well. Well done!

--Marie

You think yourself a failure, but perhaps the biggest loss is winning...

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

4 posted 2001-07-16 09:41 PM

this sucha hrad topic..i think your emotions were well done here...as i can relate in a way...great job!, Tiff

..i really liked this one.

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

5 posted 2001-07-19 12:13 PM

I thought this one was ok. Not the best I've read from you. I liked the meaning of the poem though. Nicely done.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

Somewhere out there a cow is laughing at you

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

6 posted 2001-07-19 12:56 PM

a blockade built to last for all time
yet the tears rise behind this dam
i know how this feels...
this is good tiff..i really enjoyed it a lot...thanks for the great read

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA

7 posted 2001-07-19 02:59 AM

I liked the imagery of this one. Tears welling up behind the dam... I know the feeling all too well. Sometimes it's best just to let them go.

      - Cody -

Note To Self:  If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?

allie
Member

since 2001-07-09

Posts 218
Australia

8 posted 2001-07-19 04:26 AM

Really good post,
it's a common topic crying too much or not enough, but you did a great job on it... i get nice images when i read this...

ALLIE

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