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Teen Poetry #5
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It Wasn't Love
| Teen Poetry #5 |
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It Wasn't Love |
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CwboyAtHeart Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 541Selah, WA, USA 
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This one is pretty self explanitory... Just something that was on my mind that I decided to write. This is the longest poem I think I have ever written... And unlike most of mine, it doesn't rhyme. This has a lot of emotion in it, took me a while to be able to get over the past and get these feelings out. I don't know if you'll notice all the emotion in this piece, but I guarantee it's there. Let me know what you think. IT WASN'T LOVE He thought he fell in love But all he did was fall She never really wanted him But his heart was in too deep He finally got the confidence To ask her to be his She never wants to break a heart So she decided she'd say yes It was the best day of his life She was the girl of his dreams Then she finally had enough And she left him loving her He thought she was the one He wasn't ready to give up She claimed that she still liked him But it had happened all too soon So finally he asked her out again She never did respond He thought nothing of it And their friendship slowly died They began to talk off and on And they got somewhat close All of his old feelings came back And he gave her back his heart He told his friends about his love And they decided they'd tell her They asked her out for the boy She didn't know what to say They kept asking every day Until finally she gave in She went along with it for a day Then finally told the boy Mad he got for her taking his heart She tore it right out of his chest Then and there she left him there And he didn't know what to do He looked at the sharpened kitchen knife Then he looked toward God and asked, "God, if you want me to live Why they hell did she lie to me?" It was lesson that he had to learn Hearts are taken and snapped in half Depression hits and life is hard But suicide isn't the way out He looked at his life and noticed All he had and all he loved Life wasn't as bad as he thought He still had God and many friends After two months and nights of tears He talked to her once again She appologized for all she did And they understood their differences The boy here, his name is Cody Yes, this boy is me This girl I will forever love But now we're just good friends - Cody - If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!! If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid? [This message has been edited by CwboyAtHeart (edited 07-04-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 C.K.N. - All Rights Reserved | |||
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mistic Member
since 2001-05-06
Posts 233Idaho, U.S.A. |
this was really good.... I like how you portrayed the emotion. I hope things get continue to get better. |
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Fading Away
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131Lynchburg, Virginia |
This is very, very good, Cody. I REALLY liked the message. But it's like the old saying goes, "'Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all." The lines in this piece that really stuck out for me were, "Depression hits and life is hard/But suicide isn't the way out". I'm really glad you said that. This is an awesome poem... and it doesn't matter that there was no rhyme scheme... Poetry doesnt have to rhyme, and the flow in this piece is still excellent. Very nce work. --Marie You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds. |
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Spice Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266Resting in my cardboard box. |
"It was lesson that he had to learn Hearts are taken and snapped in half Depression hits and life is hard But suicide isn't the way out" My favorite stanza-Ecspecially the first 2 lines. Absolutely wonderful write here, Cody. You expressed your emotions so well. Heartbreak sucks- But I'm glad you guys could still be friends. Thanks for the read Sweetie. Keep posting.  |
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zarina Member
since 2001-05-19
Posts 180 |
It's very good. |
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Jenn Cirrincione
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107Fl |
This was good. Very emotional. Now I can see things from that POV. Unfortunatly, I've been that girl before. I just...hate saying no and hurting others. Yet, in the long run, that's much worse. I'm sorry this happened to you. Jenn "Woah my love, my darling, I've hungered for your touch a long, lonely time"- Unchained Melody |
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Suga_Baby Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380Maine, USA |
Yay! Glad it ended the way it did! Better to be friends than nothing, better to be alive than not! Great read  ,Suga "A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep." |
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Ina Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236Quebec, Canada |
This was very good Cody. I could read the emotion. I do hope all works out. Regina If you only understood my pain then maybe you could learn to be my friend. Be there. My crying shoulder. The smiles. And the caring i need to survive. |
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anonymous albert ?
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979 |
very emotional...and you expressed yourself well...the message was nicely told...great job! im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you? |
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Dopey Dope
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132San Juan, Puerto Rico |
Really nice message there Cody. I liked it a lot. An emotional piece  I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust. |
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TopGunLauren Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 718California |
Your poem is very emotional but it's also very good.Keep up the awsome work! Lauren |
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Empty tears Member
since 2001-03-12
Posts 64 |
This was Very good. Full of emotion. I especially liked the lines "he thought he fell in love/But all he did was fall" Very Nice! Death is but an escape from loneliness |
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Kicking Kim Member
since 2001-04-16
Posts 426Cloud Cucko Land! |
Not a bad poem but perhaps slightly long, maybe its just me but I did like the rhythm and the poem itself had very strong emotions held within it! Keep writing ^*~Kicking Kim~*^ |
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LoneWolf Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 384IL |
I loved this.So emtional.Great job It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that. |
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stace_co2003 Member
since 2001-03-30
Posts 497In a dream world |
*runs up and gives you a HUGE hug* awwwwwww, this was really good, I liked it hun. -->Don't frown. You never know who is falling in love with your smile. |
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Skyfire
since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381Riding |
I love it!! I just wish you hadn't had to go through all that pain to be able to write it. But, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, right? The stupid thing about "falling in love" (I'm still cynical, although not bitter) is that twenty years from now when we find "the one" for each of us, we'll look back and laugh at how retarded and foolish we were. But right now we have these very real feelings and we don't know how to deal with them all the time. I'm not worried about you, though Cody. You seem to be dealing okay with your heartbreak. Hugs. Rhonda  "Amy, can you PLEASE come to Spain with us so that we have someone to keep Rhonda calm?" - Mr. Ardiel *insert hysterical laughter from me here* |
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Acies
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665Twilight Zone |
This is a great narrative poem. The events as it unfolds makes the reader more and more curious. Beautiful write. keep it up. hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare |
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