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Teen Poetry #5
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little_krazy_poet
Junior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 41


0 posted 2001-07-01 02:20 AM



The glass is shattering
A man stands unable to stop it
He is unable to save the disfigured person within the glass
The glass is tumbling now as if it were an avalanche
falling from the highest mountain top
Alas he realizes the glass isn’t outside him, but within
The glass is a symbol of what may become
Making him realize that unless he changes his ways his life will surely shatter

WRITE WHAT YOU FEEL!! AND DON’T LET ANYONE TELL YOU TO DO OTHERWISE

WHEN YOU LIVE, YOU DIE
WHEN YOU DIE, YOUR FORGOTTEN
AND WHEN YOUR FORGOTTEN

© Copyright 2001 Matt B... - All Rights Reserved
Maynard
Junior Member
since 2001-06-29
Posts 12
IL
1 posted 2001-07-01 02:50 AM


nice, i like the symbolism of glass/his life shattering

"I have nothing to tell you or sell you for the moment... but thank you for asking."

Spice
Senior Member
since 2001-04-13
Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.
2 posted 2001-07-01 12:49 PM


Hey Matt.
I liked the symbolism you used here.
Good write.
Keep posting.

Heavens Tears
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Senior Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677

3 posted 2001-07-01 04:19 PM


I really did enjoy this one.  I loved the anology of glass, and the way you introduced it.  "Alas he realizes the glass isn’t outside him, but within"  That was great.  Thanks for the read!

*Amanda*
I need more time to find the real me...
to fly like the birds... to be set free.

anonymous albert ?
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

4 posted 2001-07-01 09:56 PM


great sybolism...and the way you expressed this was awesome ...enjoyed the poem...bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

anonymous albert ?
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

5 posted 2001-07-01 09:56 PM


great sybolism...and the way you expressed this was awesome ...enjoyed the poem...bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
6 posted 2001-07-01 11:38 PM


Yes, wonderful use of symbolism.  I really enjoyed this!  The last line about his life shattering was very good.  Nice work, indeed.  Look forward to reading more.

--Marie

You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds.

Barelybreathing
Junior Member
since 2000-04-26
Posts 46

7 posted 2001-07-02 02:18 AM


THIs is great!! I got this little click when I read it..

'The greatest thing in the world is to know how to be one's own.'
~Montaigne~


Brad Majors
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Member Elite
since 2001-04-03
Posts 2647
Georgia
8 posted 2001-07-02 12:58 PM


This is a great use of symbolism!
Isabel Galaxia
Senior Member
since 2000-06-18
Posts 733

9 posted 2001-07-02 01:09 PM


That was great.  Good symbolism.

Bel

CwboyAtHeart
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 541
Selah, WA, USA
10 posted 2001-07-02 06:52 PM


I think everybody has at one point had a "falling glass" inside of them.  Awesome imagery.  Enjoyed the poem.

      - Cody -

If Pigs Can Fly, So Can I!!!

If someboy laughs at me, does that make me funny or just plain stupid?

Skyfire
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since 2000-12-27
Posts 3381
Riding
11 posted 2001-07-03 01:12 AM


Oh, I like indeed! Powerful poem with an excellent message here! Whew! Awesome write!

Rhonda  

"Amy, can you PLEASE come to Spain with us so that we have someone to keep Rhonda calm?" - Mr. Ardiel *insert hysterical laughter from me here*

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
12 posted 2001-07-03 04:55 PM


What you said in this poem was very nice. I really liked how it all came out. Great use of symbolism, not too deep, but deep enough.
I enjoyed this one.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Acies
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
13 posted 2001-07-04 09:34 PM


Great writing my friend.  I like the sort of explanation in the end.  It makes the poem more understandable.  Keep it up and keep sharing

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Kris, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare

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