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Teen Poetry #5
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Pixie-Babe03
Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387
Central Maine

0 posted 2001-06-27 10:04 PM


well, here's the latest, Allan assisted me with it i don't know if i like it or not but i wrote it for my boyfriend...


without you in my life
I don't know what i'd do
don't worry though, I sleep at night,
lost in my dreams of you

time away from you is torture
I miss you constantly
but as soon as I see your face
everything is right to me

your voice can heal my soul
when I feel I can take no more
and just one kiss from you
has the ability to make my heart soar

no one else could ever begin
to make me feel the way you do
it warms my heart just to hear
you say to me, "I love you"

you are so sweet to me
like no one had been in the past
and I pray each and every day
your feelings for me will last

please realize thought
I can sometimes be dumb as well
but brush it off, don't get mad
because it hurts more than I can tell

I care for you so much hun,
never forget that it is true
and also keep in mind
how much I do love you!


-=Love starts with a SMILE, grows with a KISS, and ends with a TEAR=-

© Copyright 2001 Justine - All Rights Reserved
Suga_Baby
Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380
Maine, USA
1 posted 2001-06-27 10:23 PM


HEY TEENIE!! You are sittin here watching me type this right now, but I OOVE YOU! haha this poem kicks ass, even if it is MOOSHY! Moosh moosh MOOSH!! hehehe Well you know I think this kicks ass already so yeah...

ya,
Suga

P.S. Nice umm... dancing?

haha you want whipped cream on that?  

"A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep."

Fading Away
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
2 posted 2001-06-27 10:54 PM


Allan is the right guy to go to for the job    Nice work!  I really liked the meter and the flow was very nice.  The rhyme scheme was overall very good.  Nice work, Justine.  Enjoyed, as always  

--Marie

You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds.

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-06-27 11:05 PM


wow!...very sweet poem...and i really liked this alot...great poem...hope you give it to him   ...bye


[This message has been edited by anonymous albert ? (edited 06-28-2001).]

Pixie-Babe03
Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387
Central Maine
4 posted 2001-06-28 10:11 PM


i think i might give this to him actually, albert... we had a misunderstanding last week and i wrote this afterward as a sort of theraputic escape... but he isn;t really the poetry type so i'm not sure if he would appreciate it or not....

-=Love starts with a SMILE, grows with a KISS, and ends with a TEAR=-

anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
5 posted 2001-06-28 11:30 PM


This is very soppy and I'm sick to death of reading soppy ones. Not to say that your piece wasn't good. It was well written. Just watch your typos.

~AF~

Just because I hear voices doesn't mean I'm crazy...SHUT UP IN THERE!!!

[This message has been edited by anonymousfemale (edited 06-29-2001).]

Pixie-Babe03
Member
since 2000-08-29
Posts 387
Central Maine
6 posted 2001-06-29 02:48 PM


Okay AF, i am glad you think this is well written and all.   BUT i think if you are sick of your so called "soppy" poems you need to not read them and not vocalize your opinion, if you aren't happy about the posts then start your own forum about people that are unhappy in life, rather than to disrespect the happiness of others...  i wrote about MY emotions... not about YOURS so deal, it isn't your place to complain about my emotions.
BTW there was only one typo.. and there are some people in here that can't even SPELL and use the right context of words.
*Pixie*


-=Love starts with a SMILE, grows with a KISS, and ends with a TEAR=-

[This message has been edited by Pixie-Babe03 (edited 06-29-2001).]

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
7 posted 2001-06-29 07:37 PM


Pixie, on the contrary.....I think it was nice of her to express her opinion. You know she's sick of "soppy" poems....but thought YOURS was good. Now in the future when she replies to your poems and she says they are good, you'll know she actually thinks that.
What do you expect? ALL GOOD REPLIES?
C'mon.....don't get all mad about that. It was harmless.

Anyhow, I read this poem in teen 4 and I liked it. Nicely done.

Be happy!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Suga_Baby
Member
since 2000-08-06
Posts 380
Maine, USA
8 posted 2001-07-01 07:19 PM


I... am... BATMAN!!!  
Ok so groundation sucks. I am bored and I am going to take it out on.... YOU! *muahahaha*
So, uh, hey!
This is you when you marry Bobby  
and him, when he marries YOU!  
And this is going to be me  
And this is going to be Paul... Because he is just SOOOOOOOOOO coooool, don't we know it? So this is what I think of THAT!   Haha! And this is my impression of Xand's hair-do... ok, Xand PERIOD    Oooooh Heeeeeere's STANLEY!   oh WAIT... incorp. this into that last smiley   *LOL* This is so much fun! I should do this more often! Oh! oh oh oh! This is me right now!  
AND this is me also, because I think Bobby forgot my number.... AGAIN   You know, seeing how he STILL hasnt called and it's now 7pm... And we KNOW we are talking about MY Bobby, because we just KNOW your Bobby knows the # here... or was at least SMART   enough to WRITE IT DOWN! So this is me and Bobby when he FINALLY remembers the # (not that 4 little #'s are hard to remember)   and this is me right now because I am thinking of how COOL Paul is again   *slaps herself* ANYWAYS, I just decided to change my major, yo! This is me in 10 years   HAHAHA... Hey! Let's CELEBRATE!! Because umm... it's almost your 6-month WITH Bobby, and because ummm...because I... because I... have a new car! Yeah! WOOHOO!   Now clap ya hands in da air, com'on clap yo hands in da air!   Haha sorry, had a little hip-hop moment there  
Hmmm...  
YOu know what I hate? I hate CRAPPY mp3's!!! CRAPPY quality, GRRR! I'm gonna get those people that DO that to me!! AND YOU!   RAAARRRRR! Wow... I think I need to stop... who knows how long I can keep doing this to you... Ok,out of room! BYE!

"A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep."

~sugarpie313~
Member
since 2000-09-14
Posts 375
Maine, USA
9 posted 2001-07-01 10:42 PM


ok i ain't replying to the poem, i'm replying to sara's last reply on this. LMAO!! that kicks soooooooo much freakin ass you have no idea...  I LOVE IT!!!!!! hahaha



Val

Come on come on and tell me why you're staring come on come on it must be what I'm wearing…tell me why's it takin so long for u to recognize and stop

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