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scout
Member

since 2001-06-16

Posts 175
no place owns me

0 posted 2001-06-27 02:58 AM

Another night passes over day,
and in the morning i awake
                --with mist,
blurring sight of Venus.
I casually cry
  and ask myself why
the earth blocks the heavens
  from my eyes.
Finally the sun comes out
Venus is no where about
and I must wait for evening
  to see her again,
and another night passes day
and morning i shall awake
(the inconsistent end)

                      [February 4, 2000]

xscoutx
"Son of man with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears." - Ez. 24:1

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

1 posted 2001-06-27 04:28 AM

This was wonderful!!!! I really liked this one! Wow......so very well written.
Amazing job here.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

2 posted 2001-06-27 09:23 AM

very cool

Dr. Jo-Bizz
Member

since 2001-06-06

Posts 97

3 posted 2001-06-27 11:44 AM

i like this one also. i think you sent it to me before. it helps to know what you're talking about too. well, where's the picture? i want to see the baby picture, mr.-no-longer-a-junior-member! hehe. later tater.

dr. jo-bizz

But His word was in my heart
like a burning fire
Shut up in my bones;
I was weary of holding back,
And I could not.

Marshalzu

Member Elite

since 2001-02-15

Posts 2681
Lurking

4 posted 2001-06-27 01:22 PM

Great read, I hope to see more of your work in here

keep on sharing.
Andrew

"Here we are again finding ourselves at the end Of the wrong stick I guess it's far too late I'm building up the barricades In my head" -My Vitriol

DarkAngelOfTheStars
Member

since 2001-04-21

Posts 255

5 posted 2001-06-27 02:12 PM

this was great hope to see more

one morning you wake up afraid you are going to live

the_rescue
Member

since 2001-05-23

Posts 316
Japan

6 posted 2001-06-27 02:13 PM

nice write scout I like it kinda a cool thing, talk to you later ps. like your quote.

I'm not asking U 2 luv me I'm just letting out the truth no hold barred about what I feel nothing wrong with what I say

scout
Member

since 2001-06-16

Posts 175
no place owns me

7 posted 2001-06-27 02:18 PM

I sent the picture, but it got totally stretched i think, and i don't know if they'll accept it, i think i have to redo it, but i love that picture of me "ad astra per aspera."

Isn't the meaning obvious? venus the planet is only visable during dawn and dusk, you can see it without the aid of a telescope. Venus is the Goddess of Love, yet when love is there, i am unable to see it, but most of the time love is not there, so i wait, patiently for the day to come to where i can see love. The inconsistent end, is the fact that this quest for Love is never ending (and also the fact that none of us know when the end is). anyways like all my poetry this was written in a couple minutes without my knowledge.

xscoutx
"Son of man with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears." - Ez. 24:1

scout
Member

since 2001-06-16

Posts 175
no place owns me

8 posted 2001-06-27 02:26 PM

hey thanks for all your reply's, rescue, i just realized that the quote i use has been misleading, in that they don't give me enough characters to add the 6 after 24:16, and plus i had to snip ezekial to ez. when i forgot about ezra (even though ezra has only 10 chapters)

I wouldn't of noticed that if you didn't comment on it, so thanks!

xscoutx
"Son of man with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears."-Eze.24:16

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

9 posted 2001-06-27 09:30 PM

VERY nice work.  THe image you portrayed here was awesome.  I really enjoyed this... my favorite lines were:
"I casually cry
  and ask myself why
the earth blocks the heavens
  from my eyes."
That's a very sginifant part in the poem... very beautiful words.  That gives off a sense of helplessness... anyhow, very nice work.  I really enjoyed this.  I haven't read much from you, so I look forward to seeing more.

--Marie

You can’t expect the roses to grow without the weeds.

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

10 posted 2001-06-28 12:11 PM

wow...written well...i really liekd it...great job1...hope tos ee more...bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

obscurity of cloud
Member

since 2001-05-11

Posts 294
....:::::******:::::....

11 posted 2001-06-28 12:46 PM

this is one of the best i have read by you! i love the "casually cry" line, and also the allusion to venus. all you've written makes this a very complete and wonderful poem!

"so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost

obscurity of cloud
Member

since 2001-05-11

Posts 294
....:::::******:::::....

12 posted 2001-06-28 12:47 PM

yeah well you know what i'm doing now. hmph.

"so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost

scout
Member

since 2001-06-16

Posts 175
no place owns me

13 posted 2001-06-28 10:45 AM

thanks for all your replies! I really appreciate it.

xscoutx
"Son of man with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears."-Eze.24:16

Heavens Tears

Senior Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 677

14 posted 2001-06-28 03:30 PM

I agree with Marie on the best lines of the poem. It was wonderful. And the layout of it gave it a great affect. Keep it up!!

*Amanda*
I need more time to find the real me...
to fly like the birds... to be set free.

TopGunLauren
Senior Member

since 2000-08-02

Posts 718
California

15 posted 2001-06-28 03:37 PM

Awsome poem keep up the great work!
LAuren

the_rescue
Member

since 2001-05-23

Posts 316
Japan

16 posted 2001-06-28 03:49 PM

rock on scout

I'm not asking U 2 luv me I'm just letting out the truth no hold barred about what I feel nothing wrong with what I say

angel_2401
Member

since 2001-06-12

Posts 131
Cincinnati, OH

17 posted 2001-06-28 04:17 PM

This is really good, I hope to see more of your work!

I don't have an attitude problem You have a perception problem.

I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I'm perfect.

scout
Member

since 2001-06-16

Posts 175
no place owns me

18 posted 2001-06-28 07:20 PM

once again thank you, this is one of my favorites i ever wrote, it's good to hear good remarks on it.

xscoutx
"Son of man with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears."-Eze.24:16

[This message has been edited by scout (edited 06-28-2001).]

!!!
Member

since 2000-08-12

Posts 137
VA (U.S.A)

19 posted 2001-06-28 10:48 PM

really nice read here. keep up the good work!by the way, for ANYONE reading this...how DO you get your picture shown under your name???!!!

anonymousfemale
Member Elite

since 2000-02-02

Posts 2797
Limbo

20 posted 2001-06-29 07:27 AM

Wowies! I read this about 8 times. That is how much I loved it. So in my library.

~AF~

Just because I hear voices doesn't mean I'm crazy...SHUT UP IN THERE!!!

scout
Member

since 2001-06-16

Posts 175
no place owns me

21 posted 2001-06-29 10:52 AM

thank you anonymousfemale, i'm really glad you liked it that much.

!!! you have to upload your photo in the member area section, and they have to accept it, and then when you reply or edit to one of your old writings, it will add it to it, and your new ones it will add... I hope that helps...

xscoutx
"Son of man with one blow I am about to take away from you the delight of your eyes. Yet do not lament or weep or shed any tears."-Eze.24:16

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

22 posted 2001-06-30 02:25 AM

This is amazing. Such poetic words. I agree with Marie too. Those lines are very unique and has not been spoken off yet. Beautiful write, keep shairing.

hi Sweets, Kris, Lizzy, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Mare

Jenn Cirrincione

Member Elite

since 2000-07-02

Posts 2107
Fl

23 posted 2001-06-30 09:00 AM

Great poem, I liked it a whole lot. And the pic is cute! Oh and BTW...to the one who wants their pic to show, go to member's area, there should be a whole section in doing it.

"Woah my love, my darling, I've hungered for your touch a long, lonely time"- Unchained Melody

[This message has been edited by Jenn Cirrincione (edited 06-30-2001).]

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

24 posted 2001-07-05 02:11 AM

~Bump~ this one back to the top.

Absolutely AWESOME write. I totally loved this. Simply amazing.

TheFalcon'sSpirit
New Member

since 2001-09-28

Posts 4

25 posted 2001-09-29 04:40 PM

I love this one too! You are so good at writing poetry! I have a million feelings I want to say, but I don't know how.
-The Falcon
(Hannah 4 ppl who know me)

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

26 posted 2001-10-01 11:15 AM

ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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