* Sorry about the length of this one. For anyone who gets to the end of it before christmas, i would love some comments.....


I was speeding one day,
The sirens came from behind,
A young policeman stepped out,
The confident, cocky kind,

I asked,”Whats your name?”
“Billy”, he replied,
“Are you new to this?” I said,
“Yes”. I sighed.

He said, “Excuse me sir,
Can I see your license please?”
I replied “I don’t have one”
And sat back with ease,

“Can I look in the boot?”
Young Billy asked me,
“But there’s a dead body in there,
Do you really want to see?”,

“Can I check your glove box?”
Billy said, rather cautious,
“But that’s full of guns”,
Billy started getting nauseous,

“You wait right there!!!”,
Billy picked up his CB,
“I need some backup,
Right now, quickly”,

The place was surrounded,
By choppers and lights,
Fifty guns aimed at me,
Will they read me my rights?

The policeman in charge,
Said, “Where is your licence”,
“Right here”, I pulled it out,
The air filled with silence,

“What’s in the boot?”,
He said, quite confused,
“Just some fishing gear,
An old tyre I used”

He opened it up,
I was right once more,
A rod and some tackle,
Lying down on the floor,

He said “What about the guns,
You’ve got in the car?”
“GUNS????” I said surprised,
“You’ve gone way to far”

They cleaned out the car,
It was empty, not a thing,
I said,“Who told you all this?”
Everyone was still, listening,

“It was Billy”, he pointed,
“Who said those things about you”
“Well Billy is a liar,
Probably said I was speeding too”.

And so it came about,
That I got around the law,
A young Billy embarrassed,
And a ticket I never saw.