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Open Poetry #14
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Martie
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since 1999-09-21
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California

0 posted 2001-06-27 05:50 PM



The Catch

A string of words I’ll make
caught in the gills
and dangling silver streaked with wiggle gone
beneath a sunburned face
and hair streaked with relaxation
of barefooted fisher he

Behind him the falling cottonwood blossoms
cover the dirt
and fill the air with dreamy dare
of unicorns and innocence
falling into summer

The sun captures the still mountain
moving through time
layered with naked history
striations of beginnings
and the burnt orange sulfa of ends

I caught something here today
fisher I
the same as another time
where there were glass eyed buildings
and a city torched with sunrise

Do you see it with your fresh eye
and this minutes captured view

It is me

© Copyright 2001 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved
Lady In White
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since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799
USA
1 posted 2001-06-27 05:52 PM


Ah...Brava!  This is marvelous...the Pen is back!
Cpat Hair
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since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

2 posted 2001-06-27 05:58 PM


I can say only... WOW!!


Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2001-06-27 06:58 PM


Martie~
You cute little fishergirl you ! !

'A string of words I’ll make
caught in the gills
and dangling silver streaked with wiggle gone'


Wiggle gone ... NOT ...
wiggled into my heart with a smile, ya did !
LOVE - HUGS - n' other fancy stuff~
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
                               noles1@totcon.com             

Interloper
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
4 posted 2001-06-27 07:13 PM


Good catch!  What beautiful imagery.  Masterfullly woven indeed.
Sven
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since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
5 posted 2001-06-27 07:23 PM


wonderful. . . nothing like catching some fine words from such a wonderful poet. . .

I liked the image that you used here. . . very different!!!  

---------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Artistic
Member
since 2000-08-09
Posts 107
Colorado/Rochester, NY
6 posted 2001-06-27 07:34 PM


Wow1  I loved the image!  I liked how u described the fish w/out actually saying it is a fish! ^_^  Really nice!

--Artistic--

"Dreams are the touchstones of our characters"
-Henry David Thoreau



vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
7 posted 2001-06-27 08:24 PM


Martie-
   i'm loving this one!  
   wonderful!!  

   hugs,
   ~vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his
heart, you have not truely met the poet."
-vlraynes



Elizabeth Santos
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-11-08
Posts 9269
Pennsylvania
8 posted 2001-06-27 08:42 PM


Martie,
Superb, my friend
How could it be any other way
THis is a great one
Liz

Martie
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
9 posted 2001-06-28 12:17 PM


Lady--thank you for the marvelous...as for the pen, a day at a time.

Cpat--Wow, is a wonderful thing to say!

Marge--If I wiggled a smile from you then I caught a big one.

Interloper--Thank you for saying such nice things.

Sven--Nice to see you...thanks so much for stopping by and for your sweet reply.

Artistic--yup, well it was a fish...but I had to make it into words cause I had no film in my camera...thanks.

Vicky--Lovely to see you!

Hi Liz--I have missed seeing you..thanks for stopping by.

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

10 posted 2001-06-28 10:59 AM


and hair streaked with relaxation
==================

Behind him the falling cottonwood blossoms
cover the dirt
and fill the air with dreamy dare
====================

The sun captures the still mountain
moving through time
layered with naked history
striations of beginnings
and the burnt orange sulfa of ends

I caught something here today
fisher I
the same as another time
where there were glass eyed buildings
and a city torched with sunrise

Do you see it with your fresh eye
and this minutes captured view

It is me
======================

and the view is awesome.
As I read your poetry,  I realize Im holding my breath..at the same time inhaling the images while hanging on every word and I know when I get to the end..
to the poetic sweet intend...I'll be able to breath again...
but theres a catch to that...
I never want the poem to end.
yes...THE PEN is back.  
me

I'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep.
I'm in too far, I'm in way too deep over you.
You'll always be the one.
You were the first, you'll be the last.

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
11 posted 2001-06-28 11:04 AM


              "The sun captures the still mountain
                moving through time
                layered with naked history
                striations of beginnings
                and the burnt orange sulfa of ends"

Ah Martie....only you can write such beauty! The whole poem is marvelous my dear flower girl!

Mysteria
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since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
12 posted 2001-06-28 02:43 PM


Oh Martie, you just wiggled into my heart with this one, and your trip sounds awesome.  A bit of sunburn, a lot of rippling water makes for a wonderful day, and I can't wait to READ the pictures!  Excellent, and I am sure glad you are back, I missed you and your words.

"Lose your temper and you lose a friend; lie and you lose yourself."
~ Hopi ~

LngJhnAg
Member Elite
since 1999-07-23
Posts 3508
Boot+Kitty=Poetry in motion
13 posted 2001-06-28 03:08 PM


Martie!  Great imagery.  I love the way you wove this poem together.
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