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Open Poetry #14
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MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...

0 posted 2001-06-24 11:29 AM


It's overcast and dreary
Inside of me today
A cold air makes me weary
Beneath my sky of grey
I see my thoughts before me
Scattered on the ground
Fallen from a dying tree
To rot without a sound.

My stride is slow and listless
My steps are insecure
I feel as though I'm weightless
No longer am I sure.
The rug's been pulled from under me
So many times before
I've rolled away the carpeting
To see the hardwood floor.

Beyond this dismal atmosphere,
My expectations lie
In a place where days are clear
And standards will not die
Perhaps another universe
Unlike this one we know --
Within a space of rhyming verse
Where streams of Truth still flow.

I'm overwhelmed with solitude
Now that I've come to find
The reason for my stifled mood:
I'm the last of my kind.

(Copyright 1993 by: MARK V SHELDON)

"If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn."

"Everyone can hear;  few can listen."

© Copyright 2001 Mark V Sheldon - All Rights Reserved
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
1 posted 2001-06-24 12:19 PM


It will be interesting to continue reading your posts, to see exactly what last of the kind you are...

enjoying your work very much!

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

2 posted 2001-06-24 12:27 PM


I loved the cadence in this as I crave rhyme..
but I also found the melancholy theme of it part of its poetic pleasures...
great use of imagery and metaphor...
Lots of expression in this.
well done
jm

I'm going crazy, I'm losing sleep.
I'm in too far, I'm in way too deep over you.
You'll always be the one.
You were the first, you'll be the last.

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
3 posted 2001-06-24 12:37 PM


quite a lovely, if melancholy, weave
I don't think I can respond more perfectly than Janet Marie, except to say, without a doubt, I'm glad I came in

of course, I can tell she is, too, though not specifically said

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
4 posted 2001-06-24 02:30 PM


Thank you, Sunshine -- keep your eyes, mind, and heart open, and you may catch some inner glimpses.   I have many more to share...

JM, thank you as well.  I tend to be a stickler for form and rhyme since they are both elements which potentially can strengthen the message/expression.

VAS, thank you for your response.

"If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn."

"Everyone can hear;  few can listen."

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
5 posted 2001-06-24 02:56 PM


Mark, I am enjoying all of your work, also. I especially like the stanza about rolling up the rug, so it won't be pulled out again. I noticed most of them are from several years ago. Do you have some new ones to share?
Sandra

MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
6 posted 2001-06-24 03:02 PM


I do, indeed, Sandra, but all in good time...  Thank you for the compliment and observations -- that line you mentioned is one of my favorites too.

-MVS

"If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn."

"Everyone can hear;  few can listen."

Zinsser
Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641
Calif.
7 posted 2001-06-24 05:45 PM


I see my thoughts before me
Scattered on the ground
Fallen from a dying tree
To rot without a sound
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I can relate...

Once again Bravo!
Connie

walker
Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240
Florida
8 posted 2001-06-24 05:53 PM


You write about our humanity so well. And it's so true when one feels hopeless, one thinks that it's the only one feeling that way.Thanks for sharing.
MARK V SHELDON
Member Elite
since 2001-06-21
Posts 3015
In a corporeal internship...
9 posted 2001-06-24 06:29 PM


Thank you for the compliment, Walker.  I'm just observing and sharing what I've experienced with the hopes that someone, somewhere, may be a little better for it...

-MVS

"If you think you know it all, you have a lot to learn."

"Everyone can hear;  few can listen."

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