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Open Poetry #14
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Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793


0 posted 2001-06-22 05:34 PM



Eclipsed,
The sun’s face
Still burns through
Delicate bare eyes
Not designed
To look on
Such brilliance

Shaded
Eyes still flinch
When touched
By brightness
Not meant to
Be understood
Through simple
Visions

Clouded
Understanding,
With only
The form or theory
And not the soul
Seen

© Copyright 2001 Cpat Hair - All Rights Reserved
Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635

1 posted 2001-06-22 05:40 PM


face up
sun's rays
glow
eyes closed
red veins
angry
seen
clearly

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
2 posted 2001-06-22 05:45 PM


Cpat Hair,

"Eclipsed,
The sun’s face
Still burns through
Delicate bare eyes
Not designed
To look on
Such brilliance..."

Wow... your writing and wording is sooo beautiful!  Just wonderful

TaraB

RMW
Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424

3 posted 2001-06-22 05:47 PM


Feeling very much the rookie in the presence of a couple of major leaguers. Bob
Zinsser
Senior Member
since 2001-02-27
Posts 1641
Calif.
4 posted 2001-06-22 06:00 PM


Cpat,
This is soft and wonderful
If we could only think
with our souls and
not with pride.....
Thanks
Connie

vlraynes
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
5 posted 2001-06-22 06:08 PM


Cpat-
   wow...i really like this alot!
   very beautiful write...

   ~vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his
heart, you have not truely met the poet."
-vlraynes



bslicker
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-12-04
Posts 2321
state of mind
6 posted 2001-06-22 07:10 PM


I Like this
Wonderful write here, but i still don't understand Love......
  

A smile a day keeps the world in smile's.
Bernie Slicker

[This message has been edited by bslicker (edited 06-22-2001).]

Interloper
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
7 posted 2001-06-23 01:46 PM


eclipsed or shaded
clouded understanding is
a veil to the soul

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
8 posted 2001-06-23 01:54 PM


Cpat Hair,
That's a good pair of sun glasses you have. Enjoyed

DYME
Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 104
Texas
9 posted 2001-06-23 02:33 PM


Deep and and graceful.

NO WEAPON FORMED AGAINST ME SHALL PROSPER... ISAIAH 54:17

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

10 posted 2001-06-23 03:32 PM


This was indeed very graceful
Nate Dogg
Senior Member
since 1999-11-15
Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton
11 posted 2001-06-24 02:11 AM


Delicate words, a lovely write!!!

Nathan

Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
12 posted 2001-06-24 07:43 AM


A very lovely write Cpat ... you've woven these delicate thoughts beautifully, much enjoyed.  

Best wishes,
/Kit

Justbleu
Member Elite
since 1999-08-31
Posts 3329
Oregon, Originally From Alaska :)
13 posted 2001-07-01 11:53 PM


As one looks upon sunshine.....Wonderful read!!!

Bridgette  

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
14 posted 2001-07-02 01:34 AM


yes, that's about how easy love is to understand...beautiful flow of the mind and word
Roniece Dawson-Bruce
Member Ascendant
since 2000-01-29
Posts 5689
Sydney, Australia
15 posted 2001-07-02 09:02 AM


Cpat:  This is lovley.....such a nice read!
Roniece  

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

16 posted 2001-07-02 09:23 AM


Wow!! Many thanks to everyone for commenting... I worried this was too obscure in ways...so it is nice to see so many of you enjoyed!

Thanks!!!!

Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635

17 posted 2001-07-02 10:16 AM


Not so obscure that those who appreciate fine poetry wouldn't take the time to read, feel, and find understanding throughout...
Rex Allen McCoy
Member Elite
since 2000-01-30
Posts 2863
Sippin a Timmy's in London
18 posted 2001-07-02 11:00 AM


Very nicely written ... it's the first of yours I've read ... went on and read more, but came back to this one because of the truely wonderful amount of vision you've portrayed in a few simple verses
Very nice

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