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Open Poetry #14
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nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines

0 posted 2001-06-14 08:46 AM



(((Ripples)))


Stepping over the stones,
wandering, coming to play
against the soft edges of you,
an impulse flamed my dreams.
Kept me guessing, twisted thoughts
rubbing my serenity, obsessing
my awareness. Slowly,
reaching into the coolness, reflections
rippled their dance, as I skipped each memory
to the outer edge, the other side
of your hold. A gentle rain folding in,
creased the calm, touching off a steam,
a heat of desires, rising, to drift off
swept away by the breeze, leaving behind
a world, dripping in silence,
prismed in you.


(((Wynter)))


"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II


[This message has been edited by nakdthoughts (edited 06-14-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Wynter Bliss - All Rights Reserved
Watersign6
Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823
Hurricane,WV
1 posted 2001-06-14 08:48 AM


let me be the first to say i enjoyed reading this one it is very very good  
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
2 posted 2001-06-14 08:49 AM


...prismed in you....

lovely, lovely imagery....

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

3 posted 2001-06-14 08:49 AM


Some very well painted images in this which just add to the flow of thought and feel.. a softness..of chaos... of familiar...

enjoyed!!!!

Jenn Cirrincione
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-07-02
Posts 2107
Fl
4 posted 2001-06-14 09:17 AM


Wow, I'm surprised so few have replied to this. Many of my teen forum friends have told me to venture out to other places, and poems like this make me glad that I did. This was supremely beautiful. I'm happy to have had to pleasure of reading it.

Jenn

"If my heart had wings, I would fly to you and lie.. beside you as you dream, if my heart had wings." Faith Hill

VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
5 posted 2001-06-14 09:28 AM


Whoa!  Lovely, especially "prismed in you."
IWithinYou
Junior Member
since 2001-06-14
Posts 21
Within You
6 posted 2001-06-14 09:30 AM


Those last couple lines are extremely expressive and visual. The ending is extremely nice.


I consider it only a minor tragedy that I have never been able to follow a rabbit down a hole. I am still puzzled how Alice did that. Ah well, Dare to dream.

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
7 posted 2001-06-15 01:06 AM


Wynter,
in prisms or dreams you write with such perfect softness and clarity.
Keth

Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life.  Patty Hansen.



nakdthoughts
Member Laureate
since 2000-10-29
Posts 19200
Between the Lines
8 posted 2001-06-15 01:05 PM


Watersign6 and you will be the first to get my thanks  

Sunshine, thank you.I have many  kaleidoscopes and  stained glass pieces all providing me with a prismed look into my world. *s

C.. a softness..of chaos... of familiar...yes..you DO understand  *s thank you


Jenn and I am happy you took the chance to read outside of teens..thank you for your sweet words.

VAS
..I am always  prismed somehow in my life *s thank you.

IWithinYou...thank you and welcome, I love your handle..

Kethry
and you are a bright color in the
prism of my life...thank you for being a friend ((hugss))
Maureen

"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II



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