I drifted away from the closing door, stepping
into the arms of the shadow-filled night while
the pebbled street - she tossed back reflected
smiles of an enthralling full moon in thousand
shades of golden like seams of radiant lights.
After a multitude of steps, the mood persisted
to be in the state of perpetual drift as if it
was in my nature to be so, moving about in all
the walks of my life, feeding on my wanderlust
and endlessly searching for an unknown intent.
During all these walks, the road is my friend,
one of the trusted few like the lustrous moon,
the stars draping a blanket of gleaming weave,
the trees whispering kind words to the breeze,
among outlines of heavy shadows spread evenly,
mingling with the silent colours of the night.
Each of these vagabond walks seem to help in a
way, one step at a time by clearing roadblocks
that leap to slow down the traffic of thoughts
and by conjuring strength to cross over ledges
of grey shaded photographs of dull yesterdays.
Somewhere in my final walks, I expect to be an
honorary invitee to a happening where the door
will open in a gesture of heartwarming welcome
and maybe the day isn't faraway from the night
of aimless wafting into this womb of the dark.
Till then, I wish to continue in my drift with
the numerous smiling friends of the night sky.

(*!*)
thanks are once again due to Christopher who led me to this format of writing... surely a different way of writing in BLOCKS
  

[This message has been edited by Sudhir Iyer (edited 06-11-2001).]

"Build a man a fire, he'll be warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life". Terry Pratchett

I like it...I like it.

I am course going to critique it...just cause you're out of English doesn't mean you get to escape heh

I drifted away from the closing door, stepping
into the arms of the shadow-filled night while
the pebbled street - she tossed back reflected
smiles of an enthralling full moon in thousand
shades of golden like seams of radiant lights.
After a multitude of steps, the mood persisted
to be in the state of perpetual drift as if it
was in my nature to be so, moving about in all
the walks of my life, feeding on my wanderlust
and endlessly searching for an unknown intent.
During all these walks, the road is my friend,
one of the trusted few like the lustrous moon,
the stars draping a blanket of gleaming weave,
the trees whispering kind words to the breeze,
among outlines of heavy shadows spread evenly,
mingling with the silent colours of the night.
Each of these vagabond walks seem to help in a
way, one step at a time by clearing roadblocks
that leap to slow down the traffic of thoughts
and by conjuring strength to cross over ledges
of grey shaded photographs of dull yesterdays.
Somewhere in my final walks, I expect to be an
honorary invitee to a happening where the door
will open in a gesture of heartwarming welcome
and maybe the day isn't faraway from the night
of aimless wafting into this womb of the dark.
Till then, I wish to continue in my drift with
the numerous smiling friends of the night sky.

shades of golden like seams of radiant lights.

*I think 'golden like' needs to be 'golden-like'

After a multitude of steps, the mood persisted
to be in the state of perpetual drift as if it

that's really awkward hon...the verb 'to be' *is not usually effective in a poem...

During all these walks, the road is my friend,
one of the trusted few like the lustrous moon,

*I love that...wonderful.

the stars draping a blanket of gleaming weave,

*is that not meant as 'the stars a blanket of gleaming weave' - for aren't the stars themselves the blanket of weave?

the trees whispering kind words to the breeze,

*ack - cliche...lol...

Each of these vagabond walks seem to help in a
way, one step at a time by clearing roadblocks
that leap to slow down the traffic of thoughts

*I like this image - how about sharpening it up a little, maybe something like 'Each of these vagabond walks seem to help in a
way, one step at a time clearing roadblocks,
which leap to slow down thought traffic [or thought-traffic]'?

I expect to be an
honorary invitee to a happening where the door
will open in a gesture of heartwarming welcome

*Do you need heartwarming?

of aimless wafting into this womb of the dark.

*Very very nice..

Till then, I wish to continue in my drift with
the numerous smiling friends of the night sky.

*I'd cut out numerous.

Sorry I can't go into in anymore depth...not the time...I think the block format is a nice paradox to the languid tone my friend...well done...

K

It is to do with tree-ferns:
mamuka, pongo, wheki.
Shelter under here is so easily understood.
From 'Hope', by Dinah Hawkins

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee

"I was born intelligent - education ruined me"

Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life.  Patty Hansen.