navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #14 » Our Existence
Open Poetry #14
Post A Reply Post New Topic Our Existence Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada

0 posted 2001-06-09 02:53 AM


Being feminine
and sophisticated
and deep inside my mind
you're the real beyond my whims
the blessing of my seasoned time.      

Yet every time you're gone,
not very often,
you call faithfully,
your familiar voice
stirring my old feelings.
You're lonely, insecure,
calling me to speak
our words of meaning
entirely written on our hearts
and I assure you
my love for you will never die.
      
I hear you laugh
at my boyishness.
I laugh at myself
treasuring those tender moments,
that place in our love,  
where recognition
of our faithfulness
is our existence!

© Copyright 2001 Eric Lewis True - All Rights Reserved
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

1 posted 2001-06-09 03:13 AM


oh mon cherie ethome!

superb...


hear you laugh
at my boyishness.
I laugh at myself
treasuring those tender moments,
that place in our love,  
where recognition
of our faithfulness
is our existence!

I adore the raw faithfulness of this.

Tovi
Member
since 2001-06-05
Posts 168

2 posted 2001-06-09 03:22 AM


"You're the real beyond my whims"  This is EXCELLENT!  So much what I strive to reach in my writing is reflected in yours.  I just loved this.  
ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
3 posted 2001-06-09 03:27 AM


Thank you for the comments Serenity and Tovi. I really appreciate your thoughts.
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2001-06-09 07:59 AM


Every woman's treasure....
Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

5 posted 2001-06-09 08:41 AM


and deep inside my mind
you're the real beyond my whims
the blessing of my seasoned time.      
=========================
how absolutely ehnchanting is that thought...what a simply beautiful soft, subtle understated verse of "forever" and devotion that is. The whole poem is a wonderful declaration but those lines just caught in my chest...
nothing left to do but..*sigh*

Love this one Eric!!

she said I dont know why you ever would lie to me
like I'm a little untrusting when I think that the truth is gonna hurt ya
~MB20~

azblond
Senior Member
since 1999-07-01
Posts 637
The Steamy Desert
6 posted 2001-06-09 08:50 AM


Your words so sweet and true tugged at my heartstrings and leave me room for hope.  Thank you for sharing your feelings, for the glimpse into a world that is not always sad.  

Let my words fall first upon deaf ears before a closed mind...

Seymour Tabin
Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720
Tamarac Fla
7 posted 2001-06-09 09:04 AM


Ethome,
Today is philosophy day and your paper warrents merit. Sy

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
8 posted 2001-06-09 11:17 AM


philosophical indeed!!

a wonderful trip inside the mind. . . you show it well my friend. . .

--------------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
9 posted 2001-06-09 11:58 AM


ethome--told with much truth of feeling and with a hint of the tenderness in a man's shortcomings. (I hope that makes sense to you, like it does to me)  The ending is wonderful!
Poeminister
Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862
Regina SK; Canada
10 posted 2001-06-09 02:10 PM


"you're the real beyond my whims
the blessing of my seasoned time"

What a lovely line and sentiments shown with these thoughts penned.  Excellent writing!

Poeminister

rosepetals25
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Elite
since 2000-05-31
Posts 3076
PA
11 posted 2001-06-09 02:19 PM


ethome,

    I really like this one! So tender and sweet.. I couldn't pick out a favorite line if I wanted to. This was very much enjoyed

TaraB

Mistletoe Angel
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Empyrean
since 2000-12-17
Posts 32816
Portland, Oregon
12 posted 2001-06-09 02:35 PM


(sigh) Oh Eric, this is such a beautiful declaration and sentiments of true love with such an honest appeal! (smiles) True love indeed reveals the greatest joy of ones life; dreaming of my love makes me feel like a happy boy at play in my heart! Loves existence is indeed joys existence! (smiles) Your words are always so sweet and beautiful! You have such a beautiful heart, dear friend, thank you for sharing!

May love and light always shine upon you!

Love,
Noah Eaton

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
13 posted 2001-06-09 02:52 PM


You love, write with a depth that goes beyond any I can hope for...such love and tenderness you have shown us in this one....
MyEnchanted_Melody
Senior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 1106
across the land of dreams. In your heart, I'd always be.
14 posted 2001-06-09 05:43 PM



"you're the real beyond my whims
the blessing of my seasoned time"

A wonderful poem
and an especially wonderful line

ethome......
your love   is just lovely.....

Thank you
**********************

It's only me.......only me
I hope that would suffice eternally

{{to cross a sea of wonder, and hold close at heart all dreams}}

Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
15 posted 2001-06-09 06:27 PM


Very romantic and sweet writing here, ethome.  I enjoyed this.  

All writing comes
by the grace of God.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #14 » Our Existence

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary