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Open Poetry #14
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The Doubting Sky
| Open Poetry #14 |
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The Doubting Sky |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California 
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The Doubting Sky Across the pale doubting sky fades peaked day, drained of the lipid air that blew forests onto the stain of mountain. Look at the words, cool in their intricate dispatch, as if turned into one perfect molecule. Prolong the waiting until the touch of opening, the sharp points of reasoning blur with the sweet gentleness of a face. Look again, the sky has melted and slowly burned down into this knowing, fragrant with jasmine. |
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| © Copyright 2001 Martie Odell Ingebretsen - All Rights Reserved | |||
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
just don't know how to respond to this one...that ending is priceless |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
VAS--I always appreciate your honest replies...it is simple..a face changes the feeling of words, softens them and makes them human. |
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Krawdad Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597 |
Fascinating, Martie, enjoyed the read! |
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Logan Senior Member
since 2001-05-28
Posts 1641Arkansas |
very lovely, Marti..and the touch of jasmine.with the pale yellow petals..gentle smile |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
"Across the pale doubting sky fades peaked day, drained of the lipid air that blew forests onto the stain of mountain." That opening verse is a real poet catcher. Beautiful images throughout Martie! |
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Mysteria 
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328British Columbia, Canada |
Yanno I had a little 3 year old face come and brighten my day today, much like this poem! Great read Martie. ~*~ I write ~ Therefore I am ~*~ |
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Parker Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129ON |
Martie, you have such a way of painting words into such abstract beauty. Very lovely read.  Parker |
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Lady In White
since 2001-02-12
Posts 2799USA |
The scent of this reached out and touched hearts.... a keeper.... |
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Butterflies_dont_cry Member Elite
since 2000-03-06
Posts 3733Michigan |
No one paints poetry like you do my friend... this is so full of the imagery that speaks to a reader heart and soul...so much so that I swear I can smell the jasmine...Thank you as always for writing the way that only you can, as always Martie...it's a pleasure to read~ |
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Corinne Member Ascendant
since 1999-10-28
Posts 5167state of confusion |
So very lovely, Martie, I always truly find joy in reading your work! Corinne |
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RebeccaJoy Junior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 35 |
You write beautifully and with much individuality. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Martie, A tennder beautiful write. |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
drained of the lipid air that blew forests onto the stain of mountain. Look at the words, cool in their intricate dispatch, as if turned into one perfect molecule. Prolong the waiting until the touch of opening, the sharp points of reasoning blur with the sweet gentleness of a face. Look again, the sky has melted and slowly burned down into this knowing, fragrant with jasmine. ============================ this is so delicate and imagery kissed... and that title is so cool... and made me think of a couple more of yours that are favs of mine, with the Sky being part of their beauty... your work is always so deep and layered... so much intricate emotion and observation of people and human nature, all explained with comparisons of mother natures gifts. Which all comes from your gifted pen  I'm hanging on your every word |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
You are one amazing writer, you know that? Kathleen Blake |
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Auguste
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953By the sea |
Martie, Your imagery is lovely, my friend, but I've really no clue what it is you're trying to convey in this poem. Michael |
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
I hope I understood your poem. The writing was beautiful. Joyce |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
Krawdad--appreciate the facination. Logan--nothing quite like jasmine as you seem to now..thank you. ethome--If it caught you then I'm glad. Sharon--A three year olds face does bring a smile..thanks for the comparison. Parker--I'm always glad to see you! Lady--thanks so much for a lovely comment. Butterflies--I don't get the pleasure of your comments too often...and what you said was heart warming..thank you so much. Corinne--If you found joy...then I have done well. Rebecca--Thank you for stopping by and for the nice comment. Janet--When I'm unsure of myself, all I need do is read one of your replies...thank you for that! Kathleen--You are so sweet...thanks..I like your writing too, ya know? Michael--Sometimes it is not important that the exact meaning be known..as long as it give pleasure to read...thank you for your reply. Joyce--the understanding is there in the beauty you perceived...thank you. |
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Dark Angel Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095 |
You're amazing Martie! This poem is absolutely gorgeous sigh Loved it Maree |
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Watersign6 Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823Hurricane,WV |
dont know how i missed this poem of yours but i sure am glad i found it,its GREAT! |
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