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Open Poetry #14
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Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635


0 posted 2001-05-30 04:23 PM



in shadows of thy light

intimate to one’s vision’s seek
knowledge centers at a peak
where light begins
and shadows end
would thou show me…gray

in warmth, this gray, a show
of shadows come to play
a grope in dim, this want
begins
would thou show me…gray

and in this shadow, thus

undone

simple thy lines yet left
undone
and in a moment, gifted
this       lifetime's      breath

undone

speaking in the over and around
and centering me
I feel the pin

this pinch of truth, that he would
set me free to be

undone

in a moment's gift
then he turns the lift
and speaks over and around
and centered me found
never a moment floundering
even in the gasp
for his grasp
so tender
so dear

so

right
held me in the long done of night
and tho I seek to share
this great grateful feel
I am
undone
and left in light,
unreal


in shadows of thy light

intimate to one’s visions’ seek
knowledge centers at a peak
where light begins
and shadows end
would thou show me…gray

in warmth, this gray, a show
of shadows come to play
a grope in dim, this want
begins
would thou show me…gray

and in the shadow of thy light,
leave me

undone


[This message has been edited by Decaflame (edited 05-30-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Decaflame - All Rights Reserved
ArticulatedSigh
Junior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 26

1 posted 2001-05-30 04:32 PM


What a fine and moving write.
Internal seeking outward
inspired by luminations epiphany thy
new home enter to adorn

For the moment swallows all things blinding our eyes to Heaven.

SEA
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 5 Tours
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676
with you
2 posted 2001-05-30 04:32 PM


this is VERY timely for me.....big *sigh*  wow.....really like this one.....I need it in my library....   SEA
Charisma
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-09-30
Posts 5906
lost in blue pages
3 posted 2001-05-30 04:54 PM


fabulous write....and write with words of art.....excellent piece.

Charisma

Auguste
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Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
4 posted 2001-05-30 05:40 PM


Moving, groping, probing and I think, coping.  An excellent piece, Decaflame.  

Michael

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

lunatic
Member
since 2001-04-20
Posts 172

5 posted 2001-05-30 06:21 PM


Shadow of my light
no longer gray but white hot
at the very core.
Our work has yet to be done
but it has started
the tender fire in our hearts
and my love leaves you undone.

Moonstruck

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

6 posted 2001-05-30 06:25 PM


I loved the verse, it left me completely "undone"  
Death
Member
since 2001-05-26
Posts 112
Twilight
7 posted 2001-05-31 05:34 AM


While residing shadow like
I cannot but be intrigued
by light its clarity of being
sustainer of life for once I was
alive in light I remember inspired
words the dark dwellers rememberance sired

I have a friend who once said-"Sooner or later, Death makes a believer out of just about everyone."

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
8 posted 2001-05-31 07:19 AM


I love depth of these wonderful searching thoughts...it's a very interesting flow which seems to be broken in the proper places by the writer's thoughts.   I love the idea of repeating this fab verse....

               "intimate to one’s visions’ seek
                knowledge centers at a peak
                where light begins
                and shadows end
                would thou show me…gray"

Mendy
Junior Member
since 2000-11-11
Posts 34

9 posted 2001-05-31 09:06 AM


This is the smoothest, most evocative piece of work I've seen in a long time - since I read it a few hours ago my mind has been trying to work out the images and  more than one scenerio unfolds - this is a pleasure in itself and I thank you.

if it is true that the world talks toomuch then let us all keep quiet and hear the eloquence of silence - Richard Ntiru  

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
10 posted 2001-05-31 10:07 AM


enjoy
RebeccaJoy
Junior Member
since 2001-05-30
Posts 35

11 posted 2001-05-31 11:51 AM


This is beautiful.  
Interloper
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
12 posted 2001-05-31 07:21 PM


This took my breath away ...

Live for love. Without love, you don't live.


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

13 posted 2001-05-31 09:46 PM


on your constructive critique you say...
"say anything you wish" ...

OK ....

I wish I had wrote this  

*leaves thread shaking head with poetic envy*

I'm hanging on your every word
Even if you dont want to speak tonite
It's alright
I'm sitting outside heaven's door
listening to you breathe

Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635

14 posted 2001-07-03 03:20 PM


You are all so very, very kind with your comments to the new kid on the block...thank you so very much....
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