navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #14 » Causal Heart
Open Poetry #14
Post A Reply Post New Topic Causal Heart Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

0 posted 2001-05-23 09:19 PM


Who knows whether our hearts were broken
We could have investigated the casual
relationship between rain storms if we
wanted too, lay down by the waters edge
and watch the heavens move, but it seems
so distant
If I knew the exact place my heart stops
maybe I could fall effortlessly in love, but
it leaves me stranded in a tale of time

We painted the mountains with colorful
expression and watched autumn fall softly
upon the earth in October,
Winter was harsh and long
with bitter reminders of how
cold the world can actually be
even in candlelight nights

I wanted to sleep naked with you
and feel warmth, but felt
it inappropriate due to the mood of life
so again I lay my head upon
the pillow and wept

****



Nothing Beautiful In This World
Is Ever Really Lost
All Things Beloved
Live on In Our Hearts...Forever."


[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (edited 05-25-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Lauren~ - All Rights Reserved
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136
Mobile, AL
1 posted 2001-05-23 09:22 PM


OMG!

As I said somewhere before..
YOu are getting better..

Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136
Mobile, AL
2 posted 2001-05-23 09:23 PM


LOL! DUH! Sorry..I mean..its not like you already weren't exceptional, but you amaze me every time you post.

Auguste
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
3 posted 2001-05-23 10:14 PM


Lauren,

Such a lovely poem to contain so much sadness, my friend.  Take care and (((hugs))) to you.

Michael

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
4 posted 2001-05-23 11:10 PM


Lauren....you pass the feel along with your words....

that is a poet, indeed....

Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

5 posted 2001-05-24 12:18 PM


lay down by the waters edge
and watch the heavens move, but it seems
so distant
===============================
watched autumn fall softly
upon the earth in October,
Winter was harsh and long
with bitter reminders of how
cold the world can actually be
even in candlelight nights

I wanted to sleep naked with you
and feel warmth, but felt
it inappropriate due to the mood of life
so again I lay my head upon
the pillow and wept
================================

I read most of the poetry twice...
first aloud...to hear flow, cadence, etc ..
then again to silently to absorb fully,to inhale...
I cant make it past the line of "watched autumn fall" with out breaking down...
your words and the things in me they stir,
effect me this way...
and I love when poetry touches me like this
it will be a while before I will be able to finish this one outloud...
but never doubt I have inhaled every word and made them my own.
thank you for that
jm

We wish ourselves beautiful,
we cry in the night.
Its not the love you fear ...
its the fall from the height.
~Edwin McCain~

latin passion
Senior Member
since 2001-04-26
Posts 576

6 posted 2001-05-24 12:40 PM


Hopefully this is an eye opener, I read this twice, still felt it's impact. WOW
Waseem Cheema
Member
since 2001-03-16
Posts 369
Pakistan
7 posted 2001-05-24 03:32 AM


Ok I am present here for you...lolo
But it is really very Excellent...very nice way to express your sadness

JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
8 posted 2001-05-24 06:23 AM


I enjoyed the thoughts here...James
Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

9 posted 2001-05-24 02:13 PM


nice clear fresh images !!!  

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee


Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
10 posted 2001-05-24 05:47 PM


Temptress,

What a compliment you give...it means so much...thank you...


Michael,

Thank you for your support to my words always...
Sunshine,

from one poet to another, thank you kindly...


Janet Marie,

I am so touched by your words and how they affect me....I too inhale all you say...thank you dear friend...  


latin passion,

i am so glad this affected you...thanks for reading...


Waseem Cheema,


thanks so much....hugs to you...



JamesMichael,

thanks always for your thpughts...greatly appreciated...


Irish Rose,

Thanks my friend...


Nothing Beautiful In This World
Is Ever Really Lost
All Things Beloved
Live on In Our Hearts...Forever."


Mysteria
Deputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
11 posted 2001-05-24 09:08 PM


There is absolutely nothing worse than being alone when you are with someone, and did you ever get this point across, great work.

~*~ I write ~ Therefore I am ~*~
Homepage: http://www.mysteria-poetry.cityslide.com/contents/contents.cfm/451673

Victoria
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Ascendant
since 2000-08-12
Posts 5869

12 posted 2001-05-24 10:46 PM


lovely words Lauren...glad to be back again...missed everyone..hugs..lovely pic too

                  ~Victoria~

                


Every child is an artist. The challenge is to remain an artist once he grows up.

Pablo Picasso


Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
13 posted 2001-05-24 11:39 PM


Lauren--Your feelings of sadness and longing are so beauifully expressed here.
Saunni
Senior Member
since 2000-07-11
Posts 1777
West Virginia
14 posted 2001-05-24 11:47 PM


I understand the feeling of being alone even when you aren't alone. Sometimes I believe I have lived my whole life this way even though I am very loved. Great write  

Sauni

Sauni :)
Have you ever known the color grey when the nighttime finds you weak
I have, I've walked that road each time; that's where my angel sleeps

Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
15 posted 2001-05-25 12:41 PM


Mysteria~

I agree, and the point was never taken...   thanks for reading and responding...hugs to you...


Victoria~

Thanks for you thoughtful words...really is so good to see ya...hugs to you...


Martie~

thank you for taking time to read, I appreciate that much...   hugs to you...  

Saunni~

I agree with you....most of life has been the same for me...   thanks my friend for reading...


*****



Nothing Beautiful In This World
Is Ever Really Lost
All Things Beloved
Live on In Our Hearts...Forever."

[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (edited 05-25-2001).]

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
16 posted 2001-05-25 09:52 AM


So much sadness and longing, written so very beautifully.

If I knew the exact place my heart stops
maybe I could fall effortlessly in love, but
it leaves me stranded in a tale of time

I can only add - amen!

vandana
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Patricius
since 1999-10-22
Posts 10463
USA
17 posted 2001-05-25 10:08 AM


liked it
PoeticKnight
Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144
New Orleans, LA
18 posted 2001-05-25 11:51 AM


I echo JanetMarie's sentiments here, I felt this one somehow, and left me kind of sad. But glad I read it.
Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
19 posted 2001-05-25 12:04 PM


Greeneye's, a sad and lovely discriptive write. It was a joy to read.  

Parker

Sven
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Laureate
since 1999-11-23
Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA
20 posted 2001-05-25 06:18 PM


you pull so much emotion and feeling from your words. . . I'm always amazed Lauren. . .

this is no exception. . . you've conveyed them here very well. . . I can see it. . .

------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
21 posted 2001-05-25 07:32 PM


Wow...I am so thrilled that you all read and felt these words...I appreciate you all so much...THANKS...


Lauren~


***


Nothing Beautiful In This World
Is Ever Really Lost
All Things Beloved
Live on In Our Hearts...Forever."

[This message has been edited by Greeneyes (edited 05-25-2001).]

walker
Member Elite
since 2001-02-11
Posts 2240
Florida
22 posted 2001-05-25 08:29 PM


"The mood of life" sometimes makes us do or not do things that we later regret. Loved it, this one really touched my heart.
Gentle Spirit
Member Patricius
since 2000-10-09
Posts 13989

23 posted 2001-05-25 08:48 PM


Oh dear Lady you do know how so I can relate to this one.  Dear Lord Lc, this just touches me so much and each time I get the
privelage to read one of your poems I can't help but think how you have grown so much into this beautiful poetess who just reaches right out and touches our hearts so much with such exquisite writings.  Hugs to you, luv you lady.
Donna

On the wings of words our spirits fly....and our souls are free.
~Me~

Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
24 posted 2001-05-26 05:04 PM


Walker~  Gentle Spirit~

thanks for stopping  by to read....and for your kind comments...

Lauren~

***

Nothing Beautiful In This World
Is Ever Really Lost
All Things Beloved
Live on In Our Hearts...Forever."


redheart angrybraids
Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 410
honolulu, hawaii
25 posted 2001-05-28 06:28 PM


precious,i wanted to lay naked with you,
thatis so inocent and the follow words are so wise,
lovely poem

Kindly,
Redheart Angrybraids


Greeneyes
Deputy Moderator 50 ToursDeputy Moderator 10 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-09-09
Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind
26 posted 2001-05-28 09:15 PM


redheart angrybraids

Thank you so much for stopping by to read, so glad you enjoyed....


Lauren~


***

Nothing Beautiful In This World
Is Ever Really Lost
All Things Beloved
Live on In Our Hearts...Forever."


Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #14 » Causal Heart

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary