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Open Poetry #14
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Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635


0 posted 2001-05-19 07:57 AM


rubber banding

not much more
than a stretch of the gum
a rubber
banding that has just begun
that taut feel
of tension so tight
that bounding moment
of things not gone right
that rubber banding
and I await the
snap!

don’t rubber band me
it’s worse than a
whap…

I didn’t grow to argue
you know
I didn’t listen to a
fight or two
I abhor the thought
and more of this,
and I can’t take that much
from you

this stretching of
a rubber band
this solid commitment
of command
this military right! no wrong
not for the weak, or the
trying….

only the strong…

can’t you see
this trying to be?

can’t you see
the weak on their knees?

can’t you feel
the care that was there?

is it all you? was I
ever there?

snap!


© Copyright 2001 Decaflame - All Rights Reserved
VAS
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450
Oregon
1 posted 2001-05-19 10:48 AM


what a powerful, fantastically crafted metaphor!!! KAPOW!
Marge Tindal
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Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
2 posted 2001-05-19 11:34 AM


DecaFlame~

'was I
ever there?'


Skipping lightly over some memory stones here.
*Hugs*
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
                               noles1@totcon.com             

Mysteria
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Member Laureate
since 2001-03-07
Posts 18328
British Columbia, Canada
3 posted 2001-05-19 01:47 PM


Control is a powerful thing, and your poem is indicitive of how one get's lost in control, great job on this poem, that I am sure many, many can relate to Decaflame.

~*~ I write ~ Therefore I am ~*~
Homepage: http://www.mysteria-poetry.cityslide.com/contents/contents.cfm/451673

JLR
Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785

4 posted 2001-05-19 02:18 PM


Wow!  This is really impressive.  Will have to look around for more of yours.
Interloper
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-06
Posts 8369
Deep in the heart
5 posted 2001-05-19 07:08 PM


Ouch ...

Live for love. Without love, you don't live.


Auguste
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Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 3953
By the sea
6 posted 2001-05-20 06:21 PM


Decaflame,

This is a very powerful piece.  Rubber banding...it does feel like that, doesn't it?  In my opinion, this is one of the best poems of yours I've read.  Excellent, my friend.

Michael  

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

mistyrose
Member
since 2001-04-21
Posts 75
state of anxiety
7 posted 2001-05-20 07:08 PM


decaflame

what a great job you did with this
so glad i stopped in to have the chance
to see it

rubberbanding....wow

mistyrose~*

Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635

8 posted 2001-05-21 10:03 AM


I do thank you all for stopping by to read....

and for your varied comments!

brian madden
Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374
ireland
9 posted 2001-05-21 03:39 PM


you know I am reminded of what I have read of Taoism. A simple philosophy that is often hard to follow but it does have valid points.

Sometimes you lead
Sometimes you follow
Sometimes you are stifled
Sometimes you breathe easy
Sometimes you are strong
Sometimes you are weak

If you understand others you are smart.
If you understand yourself you are illuminated.
If you overcome others you are powerful.
If you overcome yourself you have strength.
If you know how to be satisfied you are rich.
If you can act with vigor, you have a will.
If you don't lose your objectives you can be long-lasting

I guess basically what it comes down to is that you don't have to be the rubber band because from your words I see you more as the golden ribbon dancing in the wind. I know that all this TAO stuff is easier said than done. I guess I am ranting but what I mean to say is take care and keep writing powerful poetry.  

"across the unfair divide
where black will never meet white
so read my token lips
like they never exist"

nicky wire


Poeminister
Senior Member
since 2000-02-26
Posts 1862
Regina SK; Canada
10 posted 2001-05-21 03:42 PM


Sharply expressed.  Nicely done.

Poeminister

RMW
Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424

11 posted 2001-05-21 03:46 PM


Decaflame....well done. Bob PS I apologize for the temporary justaposition with my recent post. Purely coincidental and quickly be corrected as mine recedes. Bob
Morgoth
Junior Member
since 2001-05-21
Posts 26
Baltimore, MD
12 posted 2001-05-21 05:06 PM


I felt the snap from over here. Keep it up, and I will keep reading...
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
13 posted 2001-05-22 03:47 PM


This is superb, Decaflame... powerful and painful!
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
14 posted 2001-05-23 05:02 AM


Powerful...

Extremely well written work...

Regards,
Sudhir

Watersign6
Senior Member
since 2001-05-25
Posts 823
Hurricane,WV
15 posted 2001-06-06 07:54 AM


this one deserves many cheers and    

Cpat Hair
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Patricius
since 2001-06-05
Posts 11793

16 posted 2001-06-06 08:25 AM


Captured the conflicting viewpoints of a struggle not wished for and not wanted... lonely feelings to be somewhere and in a conflict you don't want...

enjoyed



Decaflame
Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635

17 posted 2001-06-06 01:30 PM


My goodness, I thought this had fallen by the wayside...

thank you all so very much for your wonderful replies!

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