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Open Poetry #13
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| Open Poetry #13 |
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Gone |
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PoeticKnight Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144New Orleans, LA |
Along shores of windswept time Far away from my conscious mind Lies a place of virgin grace Where water sparkles a vintage wine There I am to cleanse my soul Torn apart by this growing hole Its light devoured by night Heeding not the thing it stole Time is short and fading fast Descending from now unto the past And in this place of virgin grace I wish that time could last Unto this place I speed along Seeing all, and what went wrong Taking bits of me from reality Until I am totally gone |
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| © Copyright 2001 J.M. Landry - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Decaflame Senior Member
since 2001-05-11
Posts 1635 |
'tis not a sad song, that one would sing but the truth, that one would bring to this heart, this sore heart o' mine peaceful comfort in thy words I find... thank you! |
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SEA 
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
you keep wowing me  |
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PoeticKnight Senior Member
since 2000-01-20
Posts 1144New Orleans, LA |
Thank you very much Deca... Thank you SEA...you wow me too. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
Hey you...mind if I bat an eyelash or two?  Or should I just say, LOVED IT? |
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VAS Member Rara Avis
since 2000-11-16
Posts 7450Oregon |
Good one, you even used some assonance in your rhyme scheme. The order of events flowed well, too. Very comtemplative. |
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Irish Rose Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263 |
I always consider it a challenge to go for perfect rhyme, makes it a bit more difficult but what a feeling when you finally get there....which I haven't in all of mine! enjoyed. Kathleen Blake |
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