navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #13 » Giving God.
Open Poetry #13
Post A Reply Post New Topic Giving God. Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
gremlin
Junior Member
since 2001-04-18
Posts 25
NY, USA

0 posted 2001-04-19 10:09 AM


God giving,
I am giving too,
They all praise him,
Who praises who?
Who keeps us in the dream,
I try to wake you up,
Just try,
You have nothing to give up.
Who is able to block the sweetest lie.
I hear there is nothing after you die.
If you were to die right now,
Can you say your life wasn't foul?
So stop living for someone who you haven't met,
He probably thinks that we are all dead.
So live for yourself and those you know,
Praise yourself before you bow.
So when he stabs you with a knife,
Make sure you can say I had the best time of my life!

04/19/2001

Enjoy, Stan.

P.S. Don't take this seriously i am just in a search of life, i change my views everyday. Any comments are more than welcome.
Love and peace to all.

Stan

[This message has been edited by gremlin (edited 04-19-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Stanislav Skobelskiy - All Rights Reserved
Embers_Before_God
Member
since 2001-03-06
Posts 101
USA
1 posted 2001-04-19 11:49 AM


Your first several lines were succinct, then around the first line beginning with "So" it seemed to drift a little bit, or at least for me.  Perhaps you could make them more concise???  Just my opinion, though I did enjoy the logic and idea behind your words...Embers

Dance with me under the moon. Touch my pale skin. Devour me. Love me.

Joyce Johnson
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912
Washington State
2 posted 2001-04-19 11:53 AM


Dear Gremlin,  This is your way of seeking.  God understands.  Joyce
gremlin
Junior Member
since 2001-04-18
Posts 25
NY, USA
3 posted 2001-04-19 11:59 AM


Hehe thanks for the comments all,
and btw my name is not Gremlin, its Stan, but i can see why you choose to call me Gremlin. Nice to meet you Joyce. Thanks for your comment, its good to see that some of us haven't lost hope yet. Keep it up!
Peace and love to everyone.

Stan

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #13 » Giving God.

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary