navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #13 » love-stone-me
Open Poetry #13
Post A Reply Post New Topic love-stone-me Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738


0 posted 2001-04-02 02:11 AM



missed you. In my dreams, last night
I missed you-- in my dreams--blind-sight
missing you in nuzzled chest--
I missed you--
I cannot find rest
Missing you,
I'll dream, pretend
each time I miss?
I'll shoot again..
a target centered
thru the chest
the place of heart
where love not rest...
and the quiver's
knead of enter--
stone in sharp
of love engendered...

Too many years from now,
there'll be....
an arrow sharpened
love stone me.

© Copyright 2001 serenity blaze - All Rights Reserved
Temptress
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-06-15
Posts 7136
Mobile, AL
1 posted 2001-04-02 05:27 AM


Beautiful..how could it fall to the bottom..I will not let it if I can keep it upwards.  

We're sorry..this heart has been d-i-s-c-o-n-n-e-c-t-e-d. Should you like to hold the line we'll be glad to reconnect you..

Just A Woman
Senior Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 507

2 posted 2001-04-02 07:41 AM


Serenity,
This flows beautifully.  Your poetry always touches depths gently, like dipping in and out of thoughts.  



"I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one."

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
3 posted 2001-04-02 07:56 AM


Serenity~
You 'flow' gently through your thoughts.
Squeezing your little 'heart' !  
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Janet Marie
Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554

4 posted 2001-04-02 04:22 PM


I'll dream, pretend
each time I miss?
I'll shoot again..
a target centered
thru the chest
the place of heart
where love not rest...
and the quiver's
knead of enter--
stone in sharp
of love engendered...

Too many years from now,
there'll be....
an arrow sharpened
love stone me.
=======================

yer so cool... ya know?
this is deep me twin...
yeppers....each time it leaves a scar...
in your case... me thinks its a beauty mark  
me

It's such a clever innocence with which you show myself to me
As if you know how it feels to never be who you wanted to be
~jackson browne~

doreen peri
Member Elite
since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
5 posted 2001-04-02 04:36 PM


"an arrow sharpened
love stone me."

what a concept, harpo.... geez.... this one's got rhythm and blues with a touch of hope despite the pain....

i dig it, girl!  

suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
6 posted 2001-04-02 05:29 PM


This is excellent, serenity... I like the comparisons you've drawn... missing hurts! *S*
Lone Wolf
Member Ascendant
since 2000-03-16
Posts 5842
Lansing, MI USA
7 posted 2001-04-02 05:32 PM


Oooh, good one my friend.  Very nice images especially at the end.  

All writing comes
by the grace of God.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

JLR
Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785

8 posted 2001-04-02 08:05 PM


Couldn't pick out one line if I tried...I loved them all!

Speak when you are angry--and you'll make the best speech you'll ever regret...Laurence J. Peter

jwesley
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563
Spring, Texas
9 posted 2001-04-02 08:07 PM


Lovely, moving piece, my friend

jwesley

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

10 posted 2001-04-02 11:02 PM


go get 'em

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee


Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
11 posted 2001-04-02 11:22 PM


sort of like the "I wouldn't miss you if you would just hold still" theory...

Wonderful title, serene one  

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
12 posted 2001-04-03 02:09 AM


Oh girl...oh yeah do I ever know this feeling
Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant
since 2000-04-26
Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
13 posted 2001-04-03 04:00 AM


A most excellent write, my friend, O Serene One...

Regards,
Sudhir

Wilfred Yeats
Member Elite
since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
14 posted 2001-04-03 03:38 PM


You are GOOD. You are VERY GOOD. As I've said repeatedly in various replies - those who write with brevity - write the best poetry. - This brief poem - communicated to me exceptionally well -   It goes among my treasures!
serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

15 posted 2001-04-03 05:52 PM


Temptress...I thank you much, my friend! For the read and the compliment! Yer loveley!

J? that was nice, I like the "dipping in and out of thoughts" thing---describes how I feel about writing perfectly. Thank you!  

Marge? lol...careful with that heart and how ya squeeze! It's held together with duct tape and superglue! (many times broken)
Love ya lots...be well, and stay near!

JM---I don't mind the scars so much...it's the growing of them that's painful!  
Hugs my friend!

doreen? biddety bop sho wap alop a bam boom...and scooby doooby! (thought I'd reply in "scat"   ) somehow? I think you understand!

suthern? I thank you much. I admire your work much, and your replies mean a great deal to me! You are a gifted poet and a generous friend!

LW...hey gal! How's "thangs?" Thanks for your consistently lovely attention...you are a sweetheart.

JLR? Gratitude in abundance! I wasn't sure if I "translated"--nice, THANKS.

jwesley? How are ya lovie? thanks for popping in, always a treat to hear from you...drop me an e, lemme know how things are going, will ya?

Kath? Sometimes I think my "get up and go"?
"GOT UP AND WENT..." But people like YOU, and all my good poet people rejuvenate me!
Thanks doesn't quite cut it--but know I am ever grateful!

Michael...I thank you much. I learn much from reading your work, and continue to study. Much gratitude.

Paula...I know you know. Sorry about the other day...will be in touch. Forgive me, but somehow I think ya understand. Hugs and thanks.

Sudhir? I just LOVE your spirit. You shine ON, my friend! Thanks you for stopping in to shine on ME!

Wils? You touch my heart with your kindness.
and this reply? I count among MY treasures. Much grat!

Thanks to all, and hugs to forum...yer all too good to me! (but don't stop!)  

[This message has been edited by serenity (edited 04-03-2001).]

catalinamoon
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-03
Posts 9543
The Shores of Alone
16 posted 2001-04-03 08:40 PM


Yes, this is wonderful. And its so right on target, too. Love it.
Sandra

Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354
Listening to every heart
17 posted 2001-04-04 08:27 AM


This sure hits the bull's eye....
Dark Angel
Member Patricius
since 1999-08-04
Posts 10095

18 posted 2001-04-04 06:59 PM


Too many years from now,
there'll be....
an arrow sharpened
love stone me.

I love it! girl.
don't stop now, ya hear me?

Maree

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #13 » love-stone-me

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary