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Open Poetry #13
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Poet deVine
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Hurricane Alley

0 posted 2001-04-01 01:05 AM




I realized today
as I watched the
mall of life
bustle about me
teeming in twos
and threes
that I
do not
exist

I must not

Circled by the many
passed by the hordes
no glance shared
no look
escaped
no eyes
turned to
me

I must not be

Purposely I stood
in the middle
matador to a throng
my cape invisible
tossed against
them as
they walked

I must not be here

No one spared a moment
not one
not a look
a glance
a peek
a stare
a grimace
a reaction

I must not be here at all

And if not?
Where am I?
Where did I go?
Will I return?
Am I dead?
Or just hiding?
Or asleep and dreaming?

I must not be here at all anymore

I must not exist

I must not ‘be’

I must not


© Copyright 2001 Poet deVine - All Rights Reserved
Marge Tindal
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Florida's Foreverly Shores
1 posted 2001-04-01 01:10 AM


Well .... SOMEBODY wrote this poem !
And I think that SOMEBODY was you !
So ... you must 'be' !
You just must !
Or I'm needing to get more sleep !

I'm a people-watcher too !
Personally ... I like to be the watcher ...
not the watched !
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

2 posted 2001-04-01 01:23 AM


"the mall of life"
that, in itself, is chilling
it could be the 'maul' of life?

I've been in this crowd, invisible, but it doesn't need to be a crowd . . .

Anyway, nice progression in this piece, PodeV.

/:-}==
=#===

tradewind
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since 2001-03-25
Posts 101

3 posted 2001-04-01 01:38 AM


and on the other hand
there are days when one
just prays to be invisible...

good poem

vlraynes
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since 2000-07-25
Posts 8229
Somewhere... out there...
4 posted 2001-04-01 01:47 AM



sharon-
  oh yes...i've known this feeling too
  many times...but, YES...you and your
  muse most definitely DO exist...
  people watching can definitely be
  interesting can't it...
  i really like this one...

  -vicky

"...until you have read the verse on his
heart, you have not truely met the poet."
-vlraynes



Auguste
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By the sea
5 posted 2001-04-01 01:52 AM


Sharon,

I liked this.  Profound in many ways.  I've felt this way often and more so lately.  Good work.

Michael

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

Mysteria
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British Columbia, Canada
6 posted 2001-04-01 04:28 AM


From one Sharon to another...I live every day like your poem...and I wonder where I am too?  I wish I could say I loved this but it hit too close to home, so I will say it was so well done - relevant, and yes you do indeed exist, and you do have your muse to keep you company that is for sure.  Great job.
Panne415
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since 2001-03-21
Posts 104
San Antonio
7 posted 2001-04-01 06:14 AM


PdeV, Veerryy Nice. I liked the way you started and ended...back at the beginning in a sense.  Liked the format. I have to ditto all the above comments too. Thanks for sharing this. Panne
nakdthoughts
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since 2000-10-29
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Between the Lines
8 posted 2001-04-01 07:27 AM


that's how I felt last week when I wrote about  waiting and watching and No One came...alone in a crowd...hmmmmm  very nicely  done

~Wynter

"The worst prison would be a closed heart".
...Pope John Paul II



2dalimit
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since 2000-02-08
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Mississippi coast
9 posted 2001-04-01 08:37 AM


Great poem. Someone is always watching you. THEY are watching you.

LoveBug
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10 posted 2001-04-01 09:45 AM


Sharon, I how how it feels to seem invisible. It isn't a plesant feeling, as you say. Just remember that you are never invisible to God and to the people here at Passions who love you! Anyway, great free-form. Thanks for sharing.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

serenity blaze
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

11 posted 2001-04-01 09:53 AM


You don't exist??? Then just WHO is picking up your mail????  

But no, I did not miss the point--but there is a certain art to invisibility--and? sometimes certain individuals "get stuck" in this magickal method. and yep, I do have the antidote! To become visable at will, you must learn to tap-dance while making MONKEY NOISES--IT WORKS FOR ME!!!!  

Love ya, crazy lady!!!

Nan
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Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
12 posted 2001-04-01 10:13 AM


Existance - or quality of existance, as you infer here, is such a relative entity... You've expressed this emotion beautifully - I expect it's a feeling that every "existant" human being has experienced from time to time...
Poet deVine
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Hurricane Alley
13 posted 2001-04-01 10:56 AM


Thank you all for your kind comments. I wrote this after standing in the middle of a mall yesterday (hence the mall matador line). I was amazed that everyone was so engrossed in their own lives they didn't seem to notice. Don't we all at one time or another ignore each other? It's too bad. We are in this life together and should at least SMILE!!      
Jamie
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since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168
Blue Heaven
14 posted 2001-04-01 11:13 AM


Sharon,, quick, run into the nearest department store-- grab one of those bug torches, strip off all your clothes, and run through the mall screaming,,, fire,, fire,  -- you will get noticed-- ( of course the men in the little white coats will notice you too).....

Very nice thoughts on this one hon...

Jamie

Tu ne cede malis, sed contra audentior ito. - Virgil.
"Yield thou not to adversity, but press on the more bravely".  


biggestal
New Member
since 2001-03-29
Posts 5
rafford........scotland
15 posted 2001-04-01 12:40 PM


people these days are so busy chasing whatever it is they're chasing........(their own tails if you ask me).......that they seem to lose sight of the pleasure that life's small change........a smile, a wink, a stranger's friendly face......can generate....


Sven
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East Lansing, MI USA
16 posted 2001-04-01 01:25 PM


that's why I always try to smile at everyone. . . you never know who's day you're going to make. . .



for you deVine. . . you do exist. . .

great poem. . .

-------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Irish Rose
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since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

17 posted 2001-04-01 03:53 PM


you not only exist - you are devine!!!!!!!!!

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee


suthern
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Louisiana
18 posted 2001-04-01 04:28 PM


Purposely I stood
in the middle
matador to a throng
my cape invisible
tossed against
them as
they walked

I love the image of this... I think we've all felt non-existent... but I've never thought of defying my invisibility! LOL I remember writing a poem called "I Exist"... same theory... I'm here! *G* Great work, PDV!

dreamer1 12 5 24
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since 2000-12-11
Posts 150
crossing between
19 posted 2001-04-01 04:39 PM


I know the feeling! When I go out, I usually make an effort to say hi to people or smile. 99 times out of 100 I'm ignored, even if I'm talking to someone I know! It's very annoying. Oh, well. Life goes on and people I respect keep walking by.

Oh, gee. I hope I've never walked by you in a mall and not smiled!

....peace as a primary objective is dangerous because it implies that we would sacrifice any principle for the sake of it....
Robert Kaplan

JLR
Senior Member
since 2001-02-04
Posts 1785

20 posted 2001-04-01 04:56 PM


I remember the first time I felt what you describe so well here...like the world had moved on without me and though I hadn't even noticed at the time, when I did it was a terribly lonely feeling.  You've captured that feeling so well.  
Temptress
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Mobile, AL
21 posted 2001-04-01 04:58 PM


Sharon,
Its not that you don't exist. Its that people really ARE so engrossed with their own selves these days. Too much so, and in a hurry too. I guess its okay to concentrate on oneself as long as we look up and notice everyone else around us once in a while. I'd rather meet a strangers eyes, smile, having never said a word than to have never even noticed them. This coming from someone shy, its valuable that I have some eye contact once in a while. It builds my strength. err..okay..sorry..Rambling Road Jenn...All said..I love your poem. Apparently so, eh? I can't stop talking.  

We're sorry..this heart has been d-i-s-c-o-n-n-e-c-t-e-d. Should you like to hold the line we'll be glad to reconnect you..

Mother_Earth
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since 2000-11-20
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1/2 year Texas & 1/2 year Michigan
22 posted 2001-04-01 05:59 PM


Poet deVine, we are from the North and then started to winter in the South.  The strangest thing that happened was to walk into a store or mall and have people smile at us!  And they even said "hello"  And when we drive, people wave! At first, I thought something must be wrong with the truck.  Now when we go North , I get the strange looks because I smile at strangers or speak or wave.  It makes me feel good, but leaves others puzzled.  Thoughtful poem and the world is ready for it and some changes.  Hugs,  ME
Wilfred Yeats
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since 2000-08-04
Posts 2704
Wilmington, Delaware
23 posted 2001-04-02 10:58 AM


I could have read the 22 responses above before replying - -
I didn't -
but I do know this -
I feel very confident in saying -
We ALL have felt 'invisible' more than once in our lives -
and since I started reading your posts
you should feel confident in knowing YOU'LL NEVER be invisable to my eyes -

This is great!

Michael
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California
24 posted 2001-04-02 11:10 AM


Oh, how I hate the mall.  The only thing worse in life has to be the DMV I think.  Now, first off, the very fact that the mall crowd didn't just mow you over is proof you exist.  Second, I think I would be more worried these days to actually be noticed by the mall crowd - then you'd have to start questing either your moral or your wardrobe.

Great poem though.  I can only too readily relate to the aloneness felt within.  Believe me when I say you are anything but alone Sharon.





Michael

jellybeans
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since 2000-10-13
Posts 2298

25 posted 2001-04-02 11:27 AM


yep I am with suthern on this one, the matador image, defying your invisiblity...great images here  
doreen peri
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since 1999-05-25
Posts 3812
Virginia
26 posted 2001-04-02 04:13 PM


that's a lot of BULL!! .... if anybody exists, i know YOU do, sharon, and with the flair and style and excitement of confronting life head on.....and there's no cape or fight or confusion which can keep you down....

a well written poem here, miss sharon.... i found it to be a divine read  

Rosebud1229
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since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
27 posted 2001-04-03 10:55 AM


absolutely hear yah~ there's something about a crowd isn't there? makes you feel as if they may walk right over you, or through you being invisible, hehe, maybe it's all those sales that makes people so self aware.
Sunshine
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Listening to every heart
28 posted 2001-04-03 11:00 AM


Hey Sharon!?....Thanks for smiling at me!  And you've got to admit, the "matador" line is priceless!  Wonderful imagery - I could imagine you standing there in the reddest of capes....
Sudhir Iyer
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since 2000-04-26
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Mumbai, India : now in Belgium
29 posted 2001-04-03 11:47 AM


Ah! Magnificent poetry... but, of course it is Poet deVine who has penned this...

regards,
sudhir

Balladeer
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Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
30 posted 2001-04-04 12:55 PM


This is the best I've seen you do...by far.

When I feel I don't exist I just miss a few payments...problem solved!  

Severn
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31 posted 2001-04-04 04:26 AM


Loving this one Sharon...

you certainly exist for me!

K

Poet deVine
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Hurricane Alley
32 posted 2001-04-04 11:27 AM


Thanks again for your comments!! I am glad to know I am 'here'!! LOL
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