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Open Poetry #13
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Mike
Member Elite
since 1999-06-19
Posts 2462


0 posted 2001-03-28 10:38 PM



Upon the banks of Ninnescah,
Wildflowers bloom at spring's first thaw,
Lone warrior rose to night's begone,
In breaking silence of the dawn.

From out the brambles and the briar,
Sudden and swift came bluecoats fire,
Spewing forth the flames of hell,
Red the grass as warrior fell.

Sounds young brave's cry on south wind's blow,
In echoed pain o'er clear stream's flow,
Tall grass prairies in trackless wave,
Wildflowers grow on warrior's grave.

Upon the bosom of the plains,
Lays faded bloom of past's remains.

© Copyright 2001 Mike - All Rights Reserved
Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774
Ontario, Canada
1 posted 2001-03-28 10:40 PM


Amazing Mike ... you set the scene so perfectly. Wonderful cadence and rhyme, very nicely written!  

Best wishes,
/Kit

tradewind
Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 101

2 posted 2001-03-28 11:06 PM


you've brought this picture to life
with your words

very well done, enjoyed it!

Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049
California
3 posted 2001-03-28 11:08 PM


Mike--It's always a pleasure to read your peotry...this is no exception.
Meadowmuse
Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263

4 posted 2001-03-29 09:36 AM


So much solemn drama in this poem, my friend, especially in these lines ~

Red the grass as warrior fell.

and

Wildflowers grow on warrior's grave.

And your end couplet is perfect. An altogether stirring tribute to such fierce tragedies.

Take care,
Claire

Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau


Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
5 posted 2001-03-29 08:23 PM



Along the Ninnescah River today ...

Mike~
This is such a beautiful tribute to the American Native Indians
whose legacy is forged along the river banks ...

Wonderfully told, my friend.
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

6 posted 2001-03-29 08:33 PM


It's beautiful and is a true warrior poem.

Kathleen Blake

"When red-haired girls scamper like roses over the rain-green grass,
and the sun drips honey."
Laurie Lee


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