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Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

0 posted 2001-03-27 03:40 PM

If Men Had Breasts

If men had breasts,
they'd more time in the bathroom
than women.

Is that possible?

They'd wear tank tops
and compare sizes
with other men.

Some
would stuff their bras
with
toilet tissue.

They'd wear shirts
unbuttoned
all the way to their
navels.

They would spend
more time
primping
in the mirror
than women.

When driving,
they'd use their bra
as a soft drink holder.

They'd wear bras
with little
red hearts
on them.

I'm shutting up before I get
in trouble.

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

ParisGrl
Senior Member

since 2000-06-01

Posts 610

1 posted 2001-03-27 03:47 PM

Auguste,

I loved this poem! its cute......hope you don't get into to much trouble...LOL

*Laura*

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

2 posted 2001-03-27 04:04 PM

Thanks, Laura. I'm glad you liked it. :-)

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

doreen peri
Member Elite

since 1999-05-25

Posts 3812
Virginia

3 posted 2001-03-27 04:27 PM

rofl!!!!!

toooooooo funny!!!
y'know what?
i don't think they'd ever get outa bed!!! lol

Honeybee
Member Ascendant

since 1999-12-26

Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA

4 posted 2001-03-27 04:40 PM

"When driving,
they'd use their bra
as a soft drink holder"
===========================

LMAO!!!!! You are just too cute, ya know that?! If men had breasts, us women would never see them again, they wouldn't need us anymore!

hehehe

Take care,
Melissa~

Katherine Chandler
Member

since 2001-03-07

Posts 280
Florida, USA

5 posted 2001-03-27 04:42 PM

I loved Melissa's comment..roflol.. a very creative poem.

Kate

Genuine poetry can communicate before it is understood.
T S Eliot

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

6 posted 2001-03-27 04:44 PM

if men had breasts
I'd stare at them when we'd talk
and I'd watch them giggle
when they'd walk

I would make them feel
so uncomfortably
then they'd know
what it's like to be me

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this is such a funny poem, you really could have taken it farther, but then you'd end up in Adult!

tradewind
Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 101

7 posted 2001-03-27 04:54 PM

thanks for the laugh...perhaps someone should do a poem "if women had ______"

i'll leave it to the reader's imagination...hehe!

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

8 posted 2001-03-27 05:01 PM

HAHAHAHA That was hilarious.
Thanks for the much needed laugh.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

JLR
Senior Member

since 2001-02-04

Posts 1785

9 posted 2001-03-27 05:12 PM

This is great!! Hilarious! As are the responses...Ha!

Just A Woman
Senior Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 507

10 posted 2001-03-27 05:16 PM

I'm only hoping if men had breasts they'd take the time to shave off the chest hair.

"Often the test of courage is not to die but to live"

~Vittorio Alferi~

inot2B
Member Elite

since 2000-09-18

Posts 2205
Arkansas

11 posted 2001-03-27 05:18 PM

They wouldn't get any work done. They'd be to busy admiring theirself. I just wonder what was going on in your life when you wrote this.

Oh did you notice on TV awards show that very few women wore bras?

Every minute you are angry, you lose 60 seconds of happiness.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

12 posted 2001-03-27 05:23 PM

( that's cuz they don't have any ......they don't need a bra.....)

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

13 posted 2001-03-27 06:19 PM

doreen,
Glad you enjoyed this. Thanks!

Melissa,
We would always need women. I would, anyway. Thanks for reading.

Katherine,
Thank you and glad this one gave you a smile.

SEA,
I considered taking it further, but...

Thanks for reading this.

tradewind,
Do a poem if women had...Yikes!! I'm gonna leave that one to somebody else.

I appreciate you reading this silly poem.

Dopey,
I'm happy you liked this one.

Thank you.

JLR,
Thanks for the "great" and for reading.

Just A Woman,
I ain't shaving my chest hair for anybody. (laughing) I'm pleased you enjoyed this nutty poem.

Thanks!

inot2B,
I don't watch TV. I'm quite serious. I find it boring. What was going through my mind? Hmmm... I didn't want to write yet another serious poem. I wanted to write something that would bring a smile. I hope I brought you one also. Thanks.

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

inot2B
Member Elite

since 2000-09-18

Posts 2205
Arkansas

14 posted 2001-03-27 06:44 PM

You did bring a smile to me. I looked at my husband and imagined him with boobs. LOL

Sven

Member Laureate

since 1999-11-23

Posts 14937
East Lansing, MI USA

15 posted 2001-03-27 06:46 PM

this is just too funny. . . I loved it!!!!

--------------------------------------------------------

To the world, you may only be one person. But to one person, you may be the world.

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

16 posted 2001-03-27 06:53 PM

inot2B,
(laughing) Hope my wife doesn't look at me that way. Thanks. YOU brougt a smile to me.

Sven,
It pleases me that you got a smile out of this dumb little poem. Thanks!

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

Marge Tindal

Member Empyrean

since 1999-11-06

Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores

17 posted 2001-03-27 09:20 PM

Michael~
I always enjoy your writing
and this was just ...
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Wonder-Bra !

And if you click the Edit Icon -
you'll see what size !
Tee-Hee !
~*Marge*~

~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com

Greeneyes

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-09-09

Posts 9903
In Your Poetic Mind

18 posted 2001-03-27 09:25 PM

if men had breast, LOL...woohooooo what a world that would be...this was fun....added a smile to my face....hugs to ya...

Greeneyes~

***

"Within you I lose myself
Without you I find myself
Wanting to be lost again."
-Unknown

coyote
Senior Member

since 2001-03-17

Posts 1077

19 posted 2001-03-27 10:04 PM

Michael, very funny write.

But looking around will show you,
The older of us do!!

"The poet is the priest of the invisible."
Wallace Stevens

Martie

Moderator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-09-21

Posts 28049
California

20 posted 2001-03-27 10:34 PM

Michael--Be careful, your sense of humor is showing...this was great fun!

Nate Dogg
Senior Member

since 1999-11-15

Posts 1658
Georgia, Fulton

21 posted 2001-03-28 12:43 PM

Wow, what a unique poem...you've brought smiles to my face...a wonderful and comical write!!

Nathan

Rosebud1229
Senior Member

since 2000-04-05

Posts 1813
North Carolina

22 posted 2001-03-28 01:06 AM

very funny, IF MEN had breast, I have to confess, it would be kinda hard to kiss, don't you think bump, bump lol

Suetang
Member Ascendant

since 2001-03-07

Posts 5187
Melbourne, Australia

23 posted 2001-03-28 01:10 AM

What an absolute classic of a poem!!!lol
I loved every word and, ummmmm, you wouldn't be a male would you by any chance???? This was a great way to brighten up a dreary day here in Melbourne. Thank you so much...Sue.

Suetang

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

24 posted 2001-03-28 01:50 AM

Hi Sue,

Thank you for the reply and I'm happy that this brought you a smile. I'll properly answer your note later when I've a bit more time. Take care.

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

suthern

Member Seraphic

since 1999-07-29

Posts 20723
Louisiana

25 posted 2001-03-28 12:08 PM

ROFL... The possibilities are endless... *G*

Auguste

Member Elite

since 2000-02-16

Posts 3953
By the sea

26 posted 2001-03-29 02:57 PM

Everyone,

Thank you, sincerely, for taking the time to read this. Your smiles also brought one to myself. I appeciate it much.

Michael

Proust-
"Love is space and time measured by the heart"

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