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A Wasted Portion by Panne
| Open Poetry #13 |
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A Wasted Portion by Panne |
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Panne415 Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 104San Antonio |
A Wasted Portion As I empty winter into spring into summer into autumn; years vanish before my cup is full. Panne © 2001 |
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| © Copyright 2001 Panne - All Rights Reserved | |||
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RMW Senior Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 1424 |
Clapping!!! |
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Panne415 Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 104San Antonio |
RMW, Thank you for reading this and applauding. A bit saddened by old age I guess when I wrote this. Panne |
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Cerenity Member Elite
since 2000-02-16
Posts 2637Escondido-California |
Hi Panne, This was wonderful and welcome to Passions hope you are enjoying your stay, Love, Cerenity "God doesn't have to be reminded that we exist. |
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Just A Woman Senior Member
since 2001-03-10
Posts 507 |
Panne, this is excellent. So very much said with so few words. I shall save and enjoy this many times over.  "Often the test of courage is not to die but to live" |
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Panne415 Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 104San Antonio |
Cerenity - Thank you and yes I am - if still very lost and confused - I think I'll stay at least as long as it takes me to figure out how to do everything - like get a permanent signature to post at the bottom of all my posts like your "God doesn't have to be...etc" and then just long enuf to read everyones poems. What? A Lifetime?? Smiles. JAW, Thank you - it is so rare for me to submit short pieces so I am glad you enjoyed. Thank you all for your input, insights and generosity. Panne |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
panne, how did you know i will like this piece? not too ashamed to confess that my mouth opened wide when i read this piece..ahhh..the emotions that went through me.....this reminds me of my personal desire to always express more in less words(as a writer) and of my continual strive to make each day count(as a person).... consider me to be gushing now  and i want to come out with a short short poem too!! [This message has been edited by faterider (edited 03-28-2001).] |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
i don't know about the signature part but i think you can add your signature when you edit your profile.... |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
very nice--- has an almost hiaku like quality to it....enjoyed! Jamie |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
I enjoyed this very much...thank you. |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
Panne, Short sweet and wonderful. |
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Packratmike Senior Member
since 2001-02-25
Posts 632California, USA |
I love short poetry. It is quite a challenge to put our thoughts into a few short poetic words. Great job, Panne! Mike |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
just a thought, panne..for me, the reason why i liked the poem so well is that the metaphor of comparing life to a glass of wine is so well-established that voila!!one reads and one would understand what you are trying to say... not complaining or anything, just wondering: will be the poem be better if you choose a new image you conjure yourself rather than use a cliche?? awaiting your thoughts |
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jwesley Member Rara Avis
since 2000-04-30
Posts 7563Spring, Texas |
Gee Panne, it all been pretty much said, but I agree with the 'so much in so little'. Think this was very well crafted and said so much. Lots of heart, longing and wistfulness in here. Well done my friend. jwesley |
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Panne415 Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 104San Antonio |
Kai - I love it when you gush -lol - I am so glad you liked this - I thought you might. I think I figgered out the signature - you have to check mark it in each post - it doesn't do it automatically. I think. Jamie - thanks. I appreciate you stopping by and posting your comments. Martie - I am glad - you are welcomed. Seymour - Thanks so much. Happy you stopped by and commented. Mike - Thanks Kai - Actually - I never saw this as a glass of wine. More like a cup of coffee - since mine at the time of writing was half empty - I am not sure this is a cliche' now- hmmm - I suppose it is when you think about it - hmmm - now I don't like this anymore - it is cliche' - well- guess I can't send this out to anyone huh. Thanks for pointing that out Kai. I appreciate your insights- you see so much more than I - I am too close to my work - hence piptalk for input. Jim - thanks a bunch - but it is cliche and will have to think whether I want to attempt this again or if that was just a thought that moment for want of more coffee - I worked on it but not hard- not sure I want to work on it more. Notice: I have a permanent ISP now - no longer a guest. It is Panne447@aol.com. So if you want to comment or critique any or all of my submitted works here and in Poetry # 12, please email at that adddress. As the instant notifications will be going to defunct addresses. Thanks all. Panne |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
cliche or no cliche, i still like this...my mouth opened wide again by the way..i guess some things don't change, huh? like the way how i perceived this poem then...now i am wondering a bit more about "empty winter"...let me think on this for a while and see if i can articulate my thoughts... |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
hey, just came back to say that i feel compelled to write a short poem of my own too...  |
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kaile
since 2000-02-06
Posts 5146singapore |
apologises for not replying to your two emails yet..it's 1.30 am in my part of the world and i don't have the energy to gush over Harry Potter II anyway, ya, came back with something of my own...not too good though but heck, i want to write something short! A review of decade friendship I was sure I knew how to laugh when I was a child I only did so with you guys as a teenager Today, Doubt crept in but I laughed even louder, setting off a chain reaction of merriment I hope life doesn't come full circle as I fumble towards middle age panne, you have 4 seasons in your short piece..i hoped to include 4 stages of life in mine.... thanks for the push and inspiration [This message has been edited by kaile (02-22-2003 12:58 PM).] |
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