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Passions in Poetry

mechanical murder

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Lexy
Senior Member
since 01-28-2003
Posts 1049
California


0 posted 09-09-2003 10:02 PM       View Profile for Lexy   Email Lexy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions  View IP for Lexy

Nothing to blame, but the hour.
The mintues grabbing hold of my ankles.
Shining silver, metal lips.
A machine like buzz levels in the air.
A steady run of words upon a callased tonuge.
Its deep now, a burrowing through my soul.
A metal spike driven in with crushing strength.
I beg of someone to come and feed off of my lips.
Tell me what you taste.
Is it blood?
Is it red?
A color no one sees.
Overlook the girl with the amber eyes.
Just keep on pacing in your cirlces.
You'll get farther then I.
I am just screaming in straight lines.
No endings.
Until now!


This needs a bit of help. Suggest away!

[This message has been edited by Lexy (09-09-2003 10:03 PM).]

© Copyright 2003 Alexis Smith - All Rights Reserved
Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 04-05-2000
Posts 1829
North Carolina


1 posted 09-10-2003 12:21 AM       View Profile for Rosebud1229   Email Rosebud1229   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rosebud1229

I like it just the way it is, loved the style of writing.
Endlessecho
Member
since 09-05-2003
Posts 402
I live within myself


2 posted 09-11-2003 01:32 PM       View Profile for Endlessecho   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Endlessecho

"Just keep on pacing in your cirlces.
You'll get farther then I.
I am just screaming in straight lines."

These lines are simply amazing!!



SharaRose
Member Elite
since 07-19-2003
Posts 2535
Somewhere out there~


3 posted 09-11-2003 02:04 PM       View Profile for SharaRose   Email SharaRose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SharaRose

A viscious cycle. Of one I know of well.

Shara @-->--

Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer!

Starsfalling
Member
since 03-18-2003
Posts 94
some where deep in the shadows


4 posted 09-11-2003 11:08 PM       View Profile for Starsfalling   Email Starsfalling   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Starsfalling

wow i really liked this... awesome writting style man

There is no peace among the stars, only an eternity of carnage and slaughter and the laughter of thirsting gods

littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 03-02-2003
Posts 9998
New York


5 posted 09-12-2003 02:12 AM       View Profile for littlewing   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for littlewing

Lexy PLEASE
do not change a thing . . .
is perfect, the imagery is amazing
nice writing
xxoo
green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 06-26-2003
Posts 1937
New Caney, Tx


6 posted 09-12-2003 01:08 PM       View Profile for green_itchy_stuff   Email green_itchy_stuff   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for green_itchy_stuff

I read this earlier but I was in kind of a hurry and didnt get to reply.  I agree with littlewing, this is awesome.  Im adding it.

Craig

a trickle of music from a well
let it spill and roar like hell!

{Lord knows Im a VOODOO CHILD}-JIMI

eor
Senior Member
since 09-26-2002
Posts 968
blues & greys


7 posted 09-13-2003 07:55 PM       View Profile for eor   Email eor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for eor

the lifestyle that i lead is vicisouly repeating a cycle a circle a sypher a sphere...anyway, don't change a thing fantastic write

"There never was a genius without a tincture of madness."

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