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Passions in Poetry

Always What You Never Said

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blackhalo
Member
since 02-15-2000
Posts 467
Denver, CO


0 posted 08-20-2003 01:39 PM       View Profile for blackhalo   Email blackhalo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to Submit your Poem to Passions   Click to visit blackhalo's Home Page   View IP for blackhalo

I'm only waiting
For the flame to consume
What's left of my fate
But impending doom

I can only see
What makes people feel
And the tears in their eyes
When the pain is too real

I write my words slowly
With the hate at the end
Filled with dead silence
Searching for a friend

I know that you feel me
In your soul, not your mind
And you touch me so slowly
Pretend to be kind

I miss you, you know that
But you'll always have her
To shelter you from
My treacherous world

© Copyright 2003 Alicia Renzelman - All Rights Reserved
green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 06-26-2003
Posts 1937
New Caney, Tx


1 posted 08-21-2003 04:32 AM       View Profile for green_itchy_stuff   Email green_itchy_stuff   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for green_itchy_stuff

How did this almost leave the posting page without a response.  This is very nice indeed and seems heartfelt.  Enjoyed.

GIS

a trickle of music from a well
let it spill and roar like hell!

{Lord knows Im a VOODOO CHILD}-JIMI

mysticpoe
Senior Member
since 02-28-2003
Posts 894


2 posted 08-21-2003 09:27 AM       View Profile for mysticpoe   Email mysticpoe   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for mysticpoe

Nice write

mysticpoe

If nothing is something
then everything is
our thoughts and feelings
and all that exists.

SharaRose
Member Elite
since 07-19-2003
Posts 2535
Somewhere out there~


3 posted 08-21-2003 11:05 AM       View Profile for SharaRose   Email SharaRose   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for SharaRose

So sad. I could feel this pain. :'(

SharaRose @-->--

Of sound, and speech let all lift the hearer!

blackhalo
Member
since 02-15-2000
Posts 467
Denver, CO


4 posted 08-22-2003 12:29 AM       View Profile for blackhalo   Email blackhalo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit blackhalo's Home Page   View IP for blackhalo

Pain, yes...  Anyway...  Beyond that point all is numb.  Thanks for the replies guys.  And green_itcy_stuff for saving it from the dogpile.  
~Alicia
eor
Senior Member
since 09-26-2002
Posts 968
blues & greys


5 posted 08-22-2003 05:23 PM       View Profile for eor   Email eor   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for eor

i dont know how i missed this one alicia, good write, really good, so much emotion and passion...adding this

"in a past life i was a woodcarver's knife: the sharpend blade of a wood cutter, the eldest son of the chief's brother: a maker of drums"

Mad_Hatter
Member
since 06-29-2003
Posts 397
Canada


6 posted 08-22-2003 06:45 PM       View Profile for Mad_Hatter   Email Mad_Hatter   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Mad_Hatter

It is indeed sad.  I loved this poem.  Great write...great write indeed.
green_itchy_stuff
Senior Member
since 06-26-2003
Posts 1937
New Caney, Tx


7 posted 08-23-2003 12:07 AM       View Profile for green_itchy_stuff   Email green_itchy_stuff   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for green_itchy_stuff

I decided to have another go at it.  Nice write. And as far as saving it, the pleasure was all mine!  Addition.

GIS

a trickle of music from a well
let it spill and roar like hell!

{Lord knows Im a VOODOO CHILD}-JIMI

blackhalo
Member
since 02-15-2000
Posts 467
Denver, CO


8 posted 08-23-2003 01:30 AM       View Profile for blackhalo   Email blackhalo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit blackhalo's Home Page   View IP for blackhalo

Glad everyone enjoyed it.  It's great to be writing again...  I have sporadic writer's block.  It attacks when I have the best inspiration points in front of me.  :p  
Anyway...
Thanks again guys,
Much appreciated.
~Alicia
Kaoru
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 06-07-2003
Posts 3888
where the wild flowers grow


9 posted 08-23-2003 03:14 AM       View Profile for Kaoru   Email Kaoru   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Kaoru

Ahh, I'm feelin' this one..
exhale
Senior Member
since 06-13-2003
Posts 648
Alberta,Canada


10 posted 08-23-2003 03:31 AM       View Profile for exhale   Email exhale   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for exhale

I know that you feel me
In your soul, not your mind
And you touch me so slowly
Pretend to be kind


this was incredible,great great write
blackhalo
Member
since 02-15-2000
Posts 467
Denver, CO


11 posted 08-23-2003 01:58 PM       View Profile for blackhalo   Email blackhalo   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems   Click to visit blackhalo's Home Page   View IP for blackhalo

Kaoru and exhale,
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and respond.  I'm glad you enjoyed it!
littlewing
Member Rara Avis
since 03-02-2003
Posts 9998
New York


12 posted 08-23-2003 02:10 PM       View Profile for littlewing   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for littlewing

Alicia - I am unsure of the inspiration of this write, but I do understand this:

I can only see
What makes people feel
And the tears in their eyes
When the pain is too real

Reminds me of "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd.  It comes and goes, you know?
nice job
xxoo
teenpoet
Member
since 10-17-2001
Posts 287
Michigan


13 posted 09-04-2003 10:02 AM       View Profile for teenpoet   Email teenpoet   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for teenpoet

Very nicely writ and I can feel the pain.  And I understand a little.  you're interesting.  Besides the fact that you share my namesake I think you may have other things in common with me.  But what....?

I don't know what I did wrong but the fae are after me now. Faeries can be so irritable.

Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 04-05-2000
Posts 1829
North Carolina


14 posted 09-04-2003 11:20 PM       View Profile for Rosebud1229   Email Rosebud1229   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Rosebud1229

very nice poem, I like the way it opened up the heart, as well as the soul,
Endlessecho
Member
since 09-05-2003
Posts 402
I live within myself


15 posted 09-09-2003 09:10 AM       View Profile for Endlessecho   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Endlessecho

Great write.  Very relatable feelings.  You presented them so captivatingly!  

Eromyna
Member
since 11-29-2002
Posts 310
Pheonix, AZ, USA


16 posted 09-09-2003 12:08 PM       View Profile for Eromyna   Email Eromyna   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Eromyna

Beautiful.

"I don't need to scream for you to deem me aggravation."

ShannonMarie
Member
since 09-09-2003
Posts 57
in a state of being


17 posted 09-10-2003 10:23 PM       View Profile for ShannonMarie   Email ShannonMarie   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for ShannonMarie

beautiful, good write
Moon Dust
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 06-11-99
Posts 2250
Skelmersdale, UK


18 posted 09-11-2003 08:21 PM       View Profile for Moon Dust   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for Moon Dust

u too hey? nice write tho, dark just the way i like it

If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come?

froggy
Senior Member
since 06-23-2003
Posts 1906
Michigan


19 posted 09-11-2003 08:40 PM       View Profile for froggy   Email froggy   Edit/Delete Message      Find Poems  View IP for froggy

I really like this blackhalo.

:-)
 
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