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Dark Poetry #3
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So this is what it feels like
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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So this is what it feels like |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486
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So this is what it feels like To be alone To hear the sound Of one lonely heartbeat As it strikes with fear Against a chest Ready to cave in So this is what it feels like To know that tomorrow Was never real And that you are destined To relive yesterday Again and again One long day at a time So this is what it feels like To know that the pain Was always real That the demons really did Come for you That fire that you felt Was hell beginning So this is what it feels like To be dead on the inside Yet be forced to live The daily routine That life throws at you The stench of regurgitated dreams Clog my nostrils with fear So this Is what It feels like To be Me |
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| © Copyright 2002 Dea_Di_Amore - All Rights Reserved | |||
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WhiteRose Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208somebody's dungeon |
hmmmmm..I'm not sure what to say about this. This is what it feels like to be "you"? I pray tis not so. An intense write! |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
Etoile, You know that I am your A-Number One fan, and this piece is another that has a too, too remarkably real hopelessness about it. It is my wish that your tomorrows, do indeed, become.....real Je t'aime ~Ed |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
DDA, There's a continuing refrain of "Now you know this is what it feels like" in a song by NIN. I couldn't help but think of it while reading this. And while that one found catharsis through rage, yours finds ......... itself. Mike |
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PoeticGoddessOfDepression Member
since 2002-07-02
Posts 439I am everywhere |
I really enjoyed this... Sad..true. I don't know where I'm going with this... anyway... Wonderful piece. |
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brian sites Senior Member
since 2002-06-25
Posts 1475usa |
hug |
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Star T Member
since 2002-07-12
Posts 182Philadelphia, US |
that was very well put together.very sad and touchy just the way i love my poetry to be.we have a lot in common...i could see it in some of the poem lines. |
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A. L. Becker Member
since 2002-09-06
Posts 167San Francisco, California |
"That fire that you felt Was hell beginning" hmmmm, i thought it meant i wuz in love...DOH! Annie :- |
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Ceinwyn Member Elite
since 2000-07-09
Posts 2175VA |
hauntingly sad... Kristen If at first you don't succeed destroy all the evidence that you tried. [This message has been edited by Ceinwyn (09-07-2002 03:30 PM).] |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486 |
Thanks guys for the kind replies... DeaDiAmore |
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Opeth Senior Member
since 2001-12-13
Posts 1543The Ravines |
"So this is what it feels like To be alone To hear the sound Of one lonely heartbeat As it strikes with fear Against a chest Ready to cave in" ~ If a writer can capture his/her experience and release that experience in words so others can completely relate, and if the writer can do so in the opening stanza, then the reader will WANT to continue on reading...you have done so here. "So this is what it feels like To know that tomorrow Was never real And that you are destined To relive yesterday Again and again One long day at a time" ~ Like being captured in a continuous, and in this case, unbearable or undesirable "loop" When will it ever end? "So this is what it feels like To know that the pain Was always real That the demons really did Come for you That fire that you felt Was hell beginning" ~ So what you felt, what you believed to be true, was real all along...and it hurts. "So this is what it feels like To be dead on the inside Yet be forced to live The daily routine That life throws at you The stench of regurgitated dreams Clog my nostrils with fear" ~ Yes, how could your dreams ever come true when you are living in a constant loop of yesterdays? "So this Is what It feels like To be Me" ~ In other words to be dead, alone, in pain, unable to live your dreams...a tragic write, indeed. Dark, moving, emotional, kept my interest throughout. Well done. |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486 |
Thanks for the reply opeth...and thanks for reading... DeaDiAmore |
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