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Dark Poetry #3
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Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia

0 posted 2002-07-31 11:59 PM


I Need...

Somewhere to hide.
No one to bother me.
Peace and quiet.
No responsibility.
A haven,
a sanctuary,
as safe as your arms
used to be.



© Copyright 2002 Dee Manders - All Rights Reserved
wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
1 posted 2002-08-01 12:13 PM


A gem, Dee

This said all that was needed.

Better days
~wranx

The shortest distance between two points...
is sometimes, intolerable.      

Bukowski

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
2 posted 2002-08-01 12:28 PM


I wish I could say more, wranx, but this is all that seems to be coming out.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

[This message has been edited by Dee (08-01-2002 12:29 AM).]

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
3 posted 2002-08-01 12:33 PM


I can identify, this is one reason that I live in a shack on a riverbank.
(of course, it does have running water, satellite and internet access. I'm no Thoreau)

~wranx

The shortest distance between two points...
is sometimes, intolerable.      

Bukowski

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
4 posted 2002-08-01 08:15 PM


Need a house mate??????

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

EagleOne
Member Elite
since 2000-03-07
Posts 2829
Between a laugh and a tear...
5 posted 2002-08-02 03:01 AM


As usual my friend, your words say all that needs to b e said, keep writing!
Moon Dust
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 1999-06-11
Posts 2177
Skelmersdale, UK
6 posted 2002-08-02 07:23 PM


Yeah I know, like this tho its short and sweet

If your afraid of the dark, then why did you come?

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
7 posted 2002-08-02 09:48 PM


Thanks Eddie, sometimes I don't think they say enough.

Moon Dust, glad you liked it.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Mark Bohannan
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-21
Posts 7269
In the winds of Cherokee song
8 posted 2002-08-02 09:59 PM


Will a quiet house in the heart of a friend do?  Tis all I can offer from way over here.  
Dragon en Morta
Junior Member
since 2002-07-31
Posts 12

9 posted 2002-08-03 01:09 AM


Oh... great finish!  The last line really does it for this one.  Without it, just another sad story.  But the directness... the power of that last line really comes across bold.

Thanks for sharing.
Dragon

secretlife
Member
since 2002-07-30
Posts 359
Grean Earth ,,,
10 posted 2002-08-03 02:33 AM


hiy dear..
Well I really like it...its few words but means alot and it keep us thinking..good ending too...keep writting,,

good luck..


Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
11 posted 2002-08-03 11:47 PM


Sounds good to me, Mark. As usual, its good to know you're there, my friend.

Love
Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
12 posted 2002-08-03 11:48 PM


Dragon, thanks for the comments. Glad you enjoyed.

Secretlife, I'm not normally a person of few words. Glad you liked it.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

Parker
Member Elite
since 2000-01-06
Posts 3129
ON
13 posted 2002-08-06 12:31 PM


I'd say all of the above, except someone to bother me constantly... lol at night.
or the day, afternoon, morning, ....

Park

bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

14 posted 2002-08-06 01:00 AM


I loved the simple, human ache of this piece.

Said if I only could ...
-KB

WhiteRose
Member Elite
since 2002-07-23
Posts 3208
somebody's dungeon
15 posted 2002-08-06 09:33 AM


Oh for just such a place. A small set of words, but a huge ache in your heart. A great write.

Love Seduces Joy From The Heart

Dee
Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330
Queensland, Australia
16 posted 2002-08-07 01:40 AM


Park, sweetie, I'll bother ya any time! (feeling a little better)

Squirrel, and ache it does.

White Rose, thanks.

Dee

Stand straight and tall, not the reflection as others see you, but as you truely are.        Clearwater

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