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Dark Poetry #3
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| Dark Poetry #3 |
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WhileIWasGone Member
since 2002-07-18
Posts 486
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Too many thoughts clog this tortured mind the world keeps changing colors I travel miles inside my soul fighting the need to be free this is a prison I have placed myself in........... I force down the pain I swallow the tears I loose myself to the internal fear no place to run nowhere left to hide loose the past forget about pride Time passes time wounds don’t heal the nightmare of tomorrow has become too real close your eyes don’t see past the skin who knows what beauty lays dead within don’t turn your back in a self pity shame don’t walk away without knowing the name face yourself and then face me look into my mirror of your reality |
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| © Copyright 2002 Dea_Di_Amore - All Rights Reserved | |||
Xeonox
since 2000-04-01
Posts 1764CA, USA |
I enjoyed the ending of your poem. Especially this lines.. ********** don’t see past the skin who knows what beauty lays dead within ************* Ronil (A mask for everyday. Imagine a life without them.) |
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wranx Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689Moved from a shack to a barn |
I especially like this "don’t turn your back in a self pity shame don’t walk away without knowing the name face yourself and then face me look into my mirror of your reality" Can't beleive that this slipped by. ~Ed In reply to "which way do we go?", the answer was never "straight", but, "progressively forward". |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
You made me rub me head...it summoned conundrum. |
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chitsank Member
since 2002-08-13
Posts 88 |
That was a good work.NIce flow. enjoyed each line. |
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MissunderstoodGrrl Junior Member
since 2002-08-24
Posts 27Ontario, Canada |
wow i really like this poem alot...i can totally relate to it..its very good..keep up the good work  -:¦:-Hey god i know i'm just a dot in this world |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
Give me a moment to get over the new picture ........ A minute more .... A minute more .... Enjoyed the poem!  (I love you, Lori) |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
The following Male Moment (tm) was brought to you by XY! When you need a reason to sigh, always trust XY. And now on with your regularly scheduled ephemeria. |
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Dragon Mistress Member
since 2002-08-26
Posts 289Washington, USA. |
I like I like!! Good work. I'm no professional, but I do know what I enjoy. I hope to read more from you!! ~*~I'm only a dreamer, with broken dreams, and only words to fall back on~*~ |
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Jamie Member Elite
since 2000-06-26
Posts 3168Blue Heaven |
Hi, and welcome to Passions. I very much liked this- it had substance, flow and emotion. I might only suggest you lose the occasional rhyme ( although sometimes incidental rhyme is great ) as it doesn't seem to fit in with all that great free verse. Again, welcome. JThere is society where none intrudes, by the deep sea, and music in its roar. |
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D edgar Grey Member
since 2002-08-21
Posts 174Hell...(aka Wisconsin) |
That was truly magnificent!! I think my favourite part would be "...I travel miles inside my soul fighting the need to be free this is a prison I have placed myself in..........." Incredibly powerful! Thank you for the awesome work!!!!! |
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