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wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn

0 posted 2002-06-09 11:49 PM


In order to avoid any undo weirdness that this post may cause, and it has, let me assure all that this is NOT about killing people.


Serial Killings

There is a place
That I’ve built
To house the corpses
To keep the bodies
Of bled-out romance
Of murdered trust

I store them there
To keep them with me
To keep them close

Fragile broken things
Scattered and jumbled
Throughout this shrine
That I’ve built
To lust and greed and deceit

I visit them still
Now and again
Examining each in turn
Frozen in time
Perfectly preserved
The scars from every hurt
Accuse and accurse

So I’ll address them
One or another
And drape them
With the vestments
Of alternative futures

And they are not soothed
And they do not forgive

_________________________


Forgive the short preface, but some people, Sheesh!



© Copyright 2002 E.F.Rose - All Rights Reserved
the_loner_23
Member Ascendant
since 2002-06-08
Posts 5479
Jacksonville, Florida, USA
1 posted 2002-06-09 11:53 PM


Dang!!!!!!!! That was a cool poem. I loved it.

Cold hands means a warm heart

renathon
Junior Member
since 2002-06-09
Posts 23

2 posted 2002-06-10 12:47 PM


If we keep past pain close, two things can happen.

We can become consumed by the memory of those tragic occurences, or we can learn to avoid that which once hurt us.

I'm not sure how we can come out of things unscathed, but I feel that it is possible.

I enjoyed the poem very much.  I'm not a fan of poems that strictly rhyme lines, because I feel it restricts the authors vocabulary and therefore his or her intended message.

Your poem uses rhyming sparsely, almost secretively and because of this I feel it is quite beautiful.  Congratulations.


[This message has been edited by renathon (06-10-2002 12:48 AM).]

arthur
Senior Member
since 2001-08-14
Posts 678
england
3 posted 2002-06-10 05:31 AM


this is really good
what a clever and neat way of expressing what is after all a common experiance.
we all have our place where we keep that which cannot be forgotten

arthur

Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

4 posted 2002-06-10 06:20 PM


Interesting metaphor about something I can well identify with...

welcome..

K

Tiersdin
Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364
east coast
5 posted 2002-06-11 11:55 AM


Awesome...

~R.T.

"I shall never bond again, as I have bonded with you..."

Enchantress
Member Empyrean
since 2001-08-14
Posts 35113
Canada eh.
6 posted 2002-06-11 02:05 PM


Very nicely penned first post.
Well done indeed...
I can identify with this.
~hugs~

~Somewhere in my heart I'm always
dancing with you in the summer rain~

kinson
Member
since 2002-05-13
Posts 66
somewhere between here and there
7 posted 2002-06-11 02:37 PM


That was pretty qwsome, i want to read more
wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
8 posted 2002-06-11 05:46 PM


Thanks to all for the welcome.

Since most of my "recollections" are a tad on the rueful side, this forum seems appropriate.
~wranx

kinson
Member
since 2002-05-13
Posts 66
somewhere between here and there
9 posted 2002-06-11 08:04 PM


well written, complements
Songbird
Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184
Missouri
10 posted 2002-06-14 02:21 PM


Thanks for your comments on my Chain of Pain poem.. I see that you are have made your aquaintance with pain too.. I have had a lifelong aquaintance with it myself and I am finding the saying true that" whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger"  I can relate very well to this poem.. keep writing and posting will be looking for more of your poems.
bsquirrel
Deputy Moderator 5 Tours
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855

11 posted 2002-06-17 10:06 PM


Send this to Trent Reznor!

She said burn ... together.
-TON

LadyPeach1
Member
since 2001-06-04
Posts 282

12 posted 2002-06-20 01:00 AM


Wow!  You say you don't have a desire to write but let me tell you, YA GOT THA TALENT MAN!!  Great write.  
LP1

wranx
Member Elite
since 2002-06-07
Posts 3689
Moved from a shack to a barn
13 posted 2002-06-20 12:05 PM


Lady,
Thanks for the compliment. Lately, it seems, I desire to write. I just don't know why. Barely made it through high school,(flunked English), never before interested me and it's poetry of all things (he said with disdain).lol

~wranx  

"Writing is a perfectly natural thing to do....just remember to wash your hands afterward"....Heinlein.

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