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Dark Poetry #3
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The End
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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The End |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
You never did understand love thrashing against life as though it were an affliction imposed upon you, rather than a gift You donned hatred in horrific colors stained across your heart & mind to protest your displeasure of the world to any who would listen I did listen Carefully peeling away layers of indifference white noise confusion & bitter resentment I found a prize Naked, vulnerable invitingly beautiful a treasure but, I'd gotten too close you had to destroy me One ax after another fell until every avenue to reach you & those I loved, became cut off forever It wasn't enough your parched throat desired more than my suffering, you longed for my life's blood unsatisfied til I lay slain before you, why? why couldn't you just let me love you? you did not prevail the sword aimed with precision for my heart tasted the bitter-sweet warmth of your own things have changed, I have changed... The curtain fell upon your last act of obsession and finally, the end... ~Tier |
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| © Copyright 2001 R.T. Webster-Mosby - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
This is a really nice piece of poetry Tiersdin...for all the pain and sharp imagery in here it reads so softly...you've used a lot of metaphor here...perhaps maybe too much to balance out the poem in places I think...but other than that it's great...I enjoyed reading it...  KAll obscurity starts with a danger: |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
Thanks Severn, I'll keep that in mind when I write from now on! *smiles* ~Tier |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
I'm with Severn, but it is still a great read and speaks of courage and lessons learned. Well done!  Isis *War produces one thing - Cemetaries. And in cemetaries there are no enemies!* |
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Tiersdin Member Elite
since 2000-11-17
Posts 2364east coast |
Thank you, Severn, point kindly taken! *smiles* ~Tier |
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dragonpoe Senior Member
since 2000-11-12
Posts 608Palm Bay, Florida |
Enjoyed this one, very moving. With the word, I am mighty, with the pen I am free.. |
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JamesMichael Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336Kapolei, Hawaii, USA |
We sometimes wonder why the object of our desire does not feel the same abut us...and in most cases we simply are not the right one...we do not fit the image of their desire...but in some cases as in this one there are tons of inner emotions and conflicts to consider and sometimes if we brave it out they will come around and sometimes they will take out all there pain and frustration on us...do we have the time to perservere...do we want to invest all that time...will they let us...if we win have we really won...will we always have to do all the giving...do we want that responsibility...James |
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amyX Junior Member
since 2001-04-02
Posts 32 |
I love this! It reminds me of another piece I wrote a long time ago, in which the sword piercing the heart represents the "release" needed to move on ... yet never can that emotional surge be replaced by the scars. I love this, again, very moving. amyX Victims, aren't we all? |
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