navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #3 » holy water
Dark Poetry #3
Post A Reply Post New Topic holy water Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
NC
Member
since 2001-02-20
Posts 89


0 posted 2001-02-21 11:17 PM


while we
were in
confessionals
lying
about
sins

father sat
on the stoop
drinking
can after can
of control
swallowing
faith
remembering...

the laying on
of hands


© Copyright 2001 NC - All Rights Reserved
Swamp¤Faeryie
Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 393
fairyland....of course;)
1 posted 2001-02-22 12:25 PM


i found this to be very powerful,to the point of cringes,cold chills,and nausea,kind of like a tori amos song that makes you sick. well anyways,deserves recognition,you wrote it well!!

sammi¤


i am kinsman to the animals,my body is part of the soil and the trees are my sisters.~halifax wilde

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

2 posted 2001-02-22 12:32 PM


swallowing
faith
remembering

Three words to say so much...FANTASTIC


Songbird
Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184
Missouri
3 posted 2001-02-22 01:17 AM


Well written. Sad though that anyone should have to endure this kind of ordeal. I wish you true healing.
Severn
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704

4 posted 2001-02-22 12:24 PM


definitely well written.


And is it all insubstantial as holy water, I wonder.

K


...and I have found a lifetime can be lived in one moment...

dragonpoe
Senior Member
since 2000-11-12
Posts 608
Palm Bay, Florida
5 posted 2001-02-22 02:01 PM


Very powerful, indeed. Great write.


With the word, I am mighty, with the pen I am free..
dragonpoe

Verve
Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 348
Singapore
6 posted 2001-02-23 01:47 AM




Impressive work.

taramw
Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738

7 posted 2001-02-23 06:30 AM


This moved me very much. Even though short, it conveyed a lot... I liked the style. Take care
~ Tara ~


may you live all the days of your life. -- jonathan swift

Panne415
Member
since 2001-03-21
Posts 104
San Antonio
8 posted 2001-03-24 03:22 AM


NC- THIS IS ABSOLUTELY wonderful!

The 'lying about our sins' the drinking control the the laying of hands - all perfect - all painting a true and timeless scene - any Catholic could definitely see-feel - be this piece. Powerful images, stated just right, no waste of words - Perfect - IMHO.

I was looking for D'poes work and the title brought me in here on a search for her works- AND I am so glad I found this. Thank you - brought back memories of mass confessions where the whole school walked the few blocks together to the church for the Easter confessions with the nuns leading the pack - many smiles. However, your work here - all my memories aside - is RIGHT ON!

Thanks,
Panne

Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
9 posted 2001-03-25 04:25 AM


Perfectly penned with vivid images.
Write on
Kethry.

Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen.



Isis
Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296
Sunny Queensland
10 posted 2001-03-25 06:31 PM


It's as though you took the memory and made truth of it. I have often wondered similar - what do Fathers, or priests want for themselves? The eternal happy ever after is a lifetime away, in the meantime they must have some personal gratification - which is what? Where they excell spiritually or even darker thoughts?
Wonderful, thought provoking piece here hon!
Isis

*War produces one thing - Cemetaries. And in cemetaries there are no enemies!*
~Isis~~Sovereign of the Spirit.



Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Dark Poetry #3 » holy water

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary