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Dark Poetry #3
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Again Amour
| Dark Poetry #3 |
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Again Amour |
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Jonas Senior Member
since 2000-03-03
Posts 796Oregon 
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This day passes like any other, colorful candies and red roses gather dust on store shelves, while sweet scented candles remain safely cocooned within sterile plastic sheaths, their ivory wicks untouched by the flirtatious kiss of a match held between fingertips. © 2/15/01 |
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| © Copyright 2001 Gary - All Rights Reserved | |||
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taramw Senior Member
since 2000-06-08
Posts 738 |
Hi Jonas  Loved this! Especially: "their ivory wicks untouched by the flirtatious kiss of a match held between fingertips." Enjoyed it immensely. Take care! ~ Tara ~ may you live all the days of your life. -- jonathan swift |
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Temptress*Moon Member
since 2001-01-15
Posts 240Long Island, NY |
This was Beautiful*S* Temptress*Moon I slept and dreamed that life was beauty was thy dream then a shadowy lie? -ESH- |
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Swamp¤Faeryie Member
since 2000-12-04
Posts 393fairyland....of course;) |
this was very very artistic!! i adore it,it needs to be in my library,great peice of work. WOOOOOWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!What more can i say huh??  samantha Do i contradict myself?Very well i contradict myself.I contain multitudes.~walt whitman |
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Severn Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-17
Posts 7704 |
I liked the flow..I liked the imagery.. you know what? I don't think it needs any punctuation at all - its style pretty much puts the pauses in there... maybe try it without the commas and see how it reads? All those commas make it an awfully long sentence I like this overall, Jonas..thankyou for the read..  K...and I have found that a lifetime can be lived in one moment... T.G.M. |
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Isis Member Ascendant
since 1999-09-06
Posts 6296Sunny Queensland |
What sad and lonely imagery portrayed here... Well done.. Isis *War produces one thing - Cemetaries. And in cemetaries there are no enemies!* ~Isis~~Sovereign of the Spirit. |
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