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Bee
Junior Member
since 2000-11-23
Posts 23
Ireland

0 posted 2001-02-01 08:58 PM


TAKEN BY LOVE, Part 2


You took me
To the edge
Pounding hearts pleasure
Whirl of confusion
Sure lover
Weak fighter
Fancy-free poet
Society bound coward
Caressing, close, caring
Gloatingly stabbing my heart
Pain stained hands
Washed in polluted love stream


You took me
Back to myself
Swimming against all odds
Naked, pain-racked, disembowelled
Tides of cold negligence
Dark waves of depression
Diving into unknown depth
Of my soul
Suffocating my hopes
Gasping, drowning, helpless
Pleading to never trust
My simple heart again

                                                                                         14.1.2001


© Copyright 2001 Bee - All Rights Reserved
Dark_kisses_Within
Senior Member
since 2000-03-21
Posts 680
Kansas
1 posted 2001-02-02 12:17 PM


awwwww bitter ending


DkW

Mario
Junior Member
since 2000-11-17
Posts 21
Ireland
2 posted 2001-02-02 01:23 PM


Bee

This is, quite simply, the most beautiful piece you have ever written (that I've seen), and far more heartfelt than much of the dross one has to wade through before connecting with higher emotions.

It is outstanding, sensitive, gentle, and full of woven imagery.

Thanks for sharing it, and I hope that some of the sentiments expressed in the final verses might one day become erased in a repost.

You certainly have the love and the light.

Mario.

Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

3 posted 2001-02-02 09:19 PM


Hi Bee,
Didn't have much trouble finding you.
I like the way you anchored the first part in "place".  Gives it a certain solidity and point of view that much poetry ignores.  The second part is very appropriately a part two and leaves you unanchored, even lost, "Diving into unknown depth".
I like your work and I'll be looking for more from you. . .
Krawdad  

Bee
Junior Member
since 2000-11-23
Posts 23
Ireland
4 posted 2001-02-07 07:21 PM


Dear DkW, Mario, Krawdad.
Thank you.
Didn't expect such strong words.

Mario, thank you for your post even though I think you exaggerate. This is simply the way I feel about irrevesible actions and more so about dormancy, hurt and the missing adequate actions at the right time. I cannot see the base of trust for a repost.
Maybe next life the love and the light can radiate.

Krawdad, thanks for your reply. The solidity you find in part one was based on very solid ( and at the time seemingly irrefutable) emotions. Well,'the breaking of the spell' is something I'll have to deal with now.

LOL, BEE.

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