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Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597


0 posted 2001-01-27 12:32 PM



As a Blackness Blooms


The crows arrive
some circle some dive
they know it’s nearly five
gathering in a tree top live

We’ve winter snow
and the crows know
about a black and white flow
as they gather now for the show

It’s no surprise
they are so wise
together as a flock comprise
a phenomenon of some great size

So silently
they arrive to tree
and we few who do not see
seem to think we are still free

But change is come
today for some
that what they have become
they are to be delivered from

Here with a friend
now at the end
they will help us off to send
along the route we all will wend

Now black and white
flow again in flight
as the crows will in their fright
rise and disappear into the night

And darkness looms
as a blackness blooms
that covers all new tombs
outside these empty glassed in rooms

1/14-26/01

© Copyright 2001 Krawdad - All Rights Reserved
Kethry
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-07-29
Posts 9082
Victoria Australia
1 posted 2001-01-27 12:35 PM


Krawdad,
vivid and haunting images, I loved it!
write on
Keth.


Those of us who refuse to risk and grow get swallowed up by life. Patty Hansen.



Dark_kisses_Within
Senior Member
since 2000-03-21
Posts 680
Kansas
2 posted 2001-01-27 12:52 PM


Very S-P-O-O-K-Y!    Well written and well expressed also.  

Loved it,
Mags

Psssstttt.... thanx for the replys to my poems, it is all appreciated!  


No person is worth your tears, and the only one that is ...... will never make you cry


Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

3 posted 2001-01-28 12:09 PM


Kethry,
Thanks for stopping by.  You like being haunted?  hhhmmmm. . .

Dark Kisses,
Spooky?  Maybe I should have kept it for Halloween?  We'll resurrect it in October.

Honeybee
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-26
Posts 5372
Ontario, CANADA
4 posted 2001-01-28 12:57 PM



Haunting imagery, very well expressed with perfect rhyme

Take care,
Melissa


The beauty of poetry gives my soul wings to fly free within dreams



dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
5 posted 2001-01-28 11:57 AM


-------------------------------------
But change is come
today for some
that what they have become
they are to be delivered from

Here with a friend
now at the end
they will help us off to send
along the route we all will wend

-------------------------------------
And darkness looms
as a blackness blooms
that covers all new tombs
outside these empty glassed in rooms

-------------------------------------

yes..change is inevitable..it will come..and they will go..and i've learned that we must keep breathing, until our moment of transition comes..and it will come....then someone else will play our role...

the blackness blooming, that covers new tombs...this stanza gives me chills, as its a scene that never truly goes away...it stays with us..its a cold, cold scene--even in the heat of summer...


very good write my friend..

hugs, g
< !signature-->

"i was thinkin'
if you were lonely
maybe we could leave here
and no one would know
at least not to the point where we would think so..."



[This message has been edited by dgvarner (edited 01-28-2001).]

Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

6 posted 2001-01-29 12:52 PM


Melissa,
Thanks for stopping by.
The rhyme was key to getting this written.  This started out as something quite different than what it ended up to be.  The
perfect rhyme gave me the structure to pull the pieces together.

g,
Thanks for the read.
Lots of symbolism here, almost too heavy, somewhat offset by the "incessant" rhyme.
It was indeed meant to convey a chill or two.
Hugs returned,
e

dgvarner
Member Elite
since 2000-05-13
Posts 3552
High Springs, Florida
7 posted 2001-01-29 12:40 PM


e..
sometimes..even the poet doesnt realize what he's written..until he notices his hearts burden has, at some point, lessened..a little...    

hugs, g

serenity blaze
Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738

8 posted 2001-01-29 01:01 PM


E/K?  I enjoyed this...could "see" it all, like stop motion frames in a movie...beautifully done, m'friend!
mirror man
Senior Member
since 2001-01-08
Posts 814

9 posted 2001-01-29 01:29 PM


This is good.  I like the image.
Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

10 posted 2001-01-29 09:15 PM


K/S,
Nice to hear from ya'.  Did you see it all?
All the blacks, all the whites?

Mirror Man,
Glad you liked it.   Thanks for the read.

Bee
Junior Member
since 2000-11-23
Posts 23
Ireland
11 posted 2001-02-02 06:48 PM


A very powerful poem, Krawdad!
So well written and great symbolism within.
Do we really need to be afraid of the dark?
It is interesting to see, how various cultures deal so differently with death. Since I live in Ireland, my attitude towards this matter has changed a lot: it is part of everyday life, accepted like birth, included in the conscions as renewal, closing the circle of life with an often very religious attitude.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts,
Bee.

(Come big black bird and carry me to the other side, where there is no judgement, pain or fear.)


Krawdad
Member Elite
since 2001-01-03
Posts 2597

12 posted 2001-02-02 08:58 PM


Bee,
Thank you for your comments.  The writing of this poem "transmitted" a fair amount of power.  I wasn't suggesting a fear of the dark tho, more the mythical, and real, power of it.  Languages have their limits.
Kraw'
(check your e-mail for more)

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