navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #4 » Weddings
Teen Poetry #4
Post A Reply Post New Topic Weddings Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
holatuwol
Member
since 2001-04-27
Posts 72
California, USA

0 posted 2001-06-26 05:09 AM


This isn't exactly the best work that I wrote over the weekend... but I decided that since Allan managed to give me the idea for the ending a long while ago (Allan and Carly are so cute!) and that this one took awhile to finish gave it good enough reason to be posted. ^_^

Besides, a non-best work would make it easier to respond to with criticisms and such... not quite as long as some of my past posts, nor is it quite as strong as some of the others... *mutters something about weak setting transitions*  Anyways, all input is appreciated, especially ideas about how to make the setting transitions smoother and less flawed... Anyways, until next time...


- holatuwol

========================================

Weddings
June 22, 2001


Clear crystal ringlets encircle a three-tier cake
As a symphony of harps come to greet an awakening new age...
Guests arrive here in almost unprecedented numbers,
Filling up the signed book of guests, page by page.

The bride and the groom, with smiles seem to be glowing...
In shining white rainment, soft and shimmering like none before.
The reception adorned with the gentle pastels of the sunset,
Pinks, purples, greens and blues... as if out of a book's magical story, mystical lore.

Soft melodies played upon flutes, pianos, clarinets, and harps...
So romantic do they melodies feel that they sweep you up off your feet.
And between the lovers... warm gentle caresses and soft, knowing smiles
Make this an event so beautiful... perhaps it could only be witnessed by true elite.

Friends and family soon arrive, filling the aisles with tears,
Filled with felicity and hope for the couple's path ahead...
Wishing blessings for the couple to be eternally paired this day
A soft, fleeting, treasured memory of the moment that they are wed.

Perhaps this is what the perfect wedding is like...
...But, you know, of this idea, I'm not so sure.
This moment, though very memorable, seems to have so little charm
I almost wish I could paint you a wedding image with so much more allure.

Find you a storyteller who will weave your tale,
A narrator whose voice penetrates through the silken, dark night...
Ask him to tell you of a setting so perfect, none could imagine its like...
And give birth to a painter who can capture that moment just right.

Imagine... a soft fresh scent fills the midnight air,
Evergreens and other trees surround the quiet scene.
A waterfall creates the backdrop, its sound distant, yet near...
Imagine a fresh water lake below... its image pure, peaceful... serene.

Forest animals gather around, as the witnesses to the ceremony,
The Gods of Nature to bless the pair in the path they shall take.
A kiss to seal the vows, the promises that have been and will be made,
Wrapped in an embrace... to paint a dream you could dream, even while awake.

The forest soon becomes yet another moonlit night,
Sealed in a desert of mirages, of images, of gentle dreams...
A special illusion that was made just for this day, this night,
In a wedding world woven by starlight and serenely cascading moonbeams.

Draped in layers of elegance and mystery made of silken cloths,
A prince and a princess from a story sealed away long ago...
The desert winds rising in greeting on this starlit night...
Huddle close, sweet prince and princess... keep your loving whispers inaudibly low.

So that no one can hear the vows that you now make,
So the only witnesses are the desert moon and the frozen, motionless sands...
The four ears amongst you two being the only ones which will remember
Your vows and promises so solid, they are like mountainous, permanent snowy-valleyed lands.

Snowflakes drift leisurely on the twilit winds,
High in the mountains, where no mortal has ever, in their lives, been...
In a swirl of snowdrops, sealed deep within a fantasy,
An icy dream speaking of a romantic tale will soon begin.

A tale where two lovers denied the freedom to be together
And hand in hand, follow their passion and elope...
Run away to a tropical paradise, so far away from humankind,
And live each day on each other's love... their lives resting alone on hope.

Pray that the romantic interlude will forever last...
And hold onto that dream... don't let go, hold fast.
Weave a memory unlike any other that has come before,
Make your wedding a moment that was worth waiting for.

Two lovers hold onto each other, so very close,
As raindrops fall and their vows remembered as they are made...
Swept up at the eye of the hurricane of their passion, in the flowing winds...
Don't let the memory of your wedding, into the winds, violently fade.

Let your heart be swept up in the storm winds of the moment,
Have your soul speak its feelings... and to thine own heart be true.
And as the setting shifts and two lover's paths merge to form one world,
Take their hand in yours... and ask them: "I do... do you?"

© Copyright 2001 MinhChau Dang - All Rights Reserved
knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
1 posted 2001-06-26 06:50 AM


aww omg. Mc this was just.. was just idk. i loved this. the last line especially. *thinks back to the wedding* ur imagery here was fantastic! the rhyme scheme was good along with the flow. the story line and just the essence of this poem r just great Mc. i think u did another wonderful job. this is just another masterpiece to add to ur collection.:p heh its wierd cuz gana and jhessy just became engaged tonight o: o so this really fit in perfectly. newayz glad to c u posting again and cant wait for the next one. *hugs* love ya muchs!
tiff

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

"I want to be in another place..."

Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
2 posted 2001-06-26 12:02 PM


Ohhh you should see the look on my face right now...I think I'm gonna cry, seriously....*sigh* *double sigh* so...soo...so yeah...   You get it...and thanks, buddy.  
  ~Carly

"Go outside and use your own eyes. You'll be surprised to see things you've never been taught..."
   ~Edouard Manet

Child of the Stars
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
3 posted 2001-06-26 12:04 PM



Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
4 posted 2001-06-27 02:16 AM


I'm just going to go and say it was good cuz it looks like what I said about the transitions made you mad  

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
5 posted 2001-07-04 02:20 PM


bah not enuff ppl saw this cuz of the new forum openin up. so im givin this a lil bump hopin ppl r still lookin in here too. *hugs* loves ya Mc! *bump*

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

I know Im not perfect but I can smile
& I hope that you c this heart behind my tired eyes

Post A Reply Post New Topic ⇧ top of page ⇧ Go to Previous / Newer Topic Back to Topic List Go to Next / Older Topic
All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format.
navwin » Archives » Teen Poetry #4 » Weddings

Passions in Poetry | pipTalk Home Page | Main Poetry Forums | 100 Best Poems

How to Join | Member's Area / Help | Private Library | Search | Contact Us | Login
Discussion | Tech Talk | Archives | Sanctuary