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Teen Poetry #4
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ethel lahootie
Member
since 2001-03-06
Posts 143
SC, USA

0 posted 2001-06-21 09:50 PM


At First Sight

I stand face to face with him
Overwhelmed with the first sight
Me in jeans
Faded, worn and tattered at the bottom
Him in khaki shorts
Clean, pressed but sagging a little
My tennis shoes with pink stripes hide underneath the frayed edges of my jeans
His feet are bare as he stands on the shiny wood floor
My pink tube top covers half of my belly button
The first button of his stripped Tommy shirt is undone
My hair is in french braided pigtails, but sloppy
Silver eyeliner and eyeshadow is smooth and even on both of my eyelids
His hair is a mess
But his sleepy blue eyes suddenly brighten with joy
No words come to mind as I try to think of what to say
Although I wonder what he is thinking
He stands face to face with me
Overwhelmed with the first sight

-this is about how i am going to "re-meet" someone that i havent seen in 3 yrs and i am quite nervous...wel...i dont really kno y i made it a poem but please help me w/it...its not that great...sorry to disappoint u guys!!
~eThEl ~


© Copyright 2001 ethel lahootie - All Rights Reserved
Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
1 posted 2001-06-21 10:08 PM


I'm not disappointed at all, this is VERY good, ethel!  The images were awesome.  This poem rocks.  Reading it aloud put a picture of it all in my mind, and everything kind of came alive.  Wonderful work, indeed.  Good luck with the reacquaintance.  I don't think there's any need to be nervous  
Wonderful poem.

--Marie

"Well the sun is slowly sinking down, but the moon is slowly rising... so this old world must still be spinning 'round. And I still love you." -James

ethel lahootie
Member
since 2001-03-06
Posts 143
SC, USA
2 posted 2001-06-21 10:37 PM


thanks for replyin!!! um...well i *hope* theres no reason to b nervous..haha thanks again!
ethel

Cinch01
Junior Member
since 2001-06-19
Posts 14
RS, BR
3 posted 2001-06-21 11:00 PM


It's a great poem. And I've been there recently so I know how it goes. Just be yourself and well, all the other things your mom would tell you to do. *lol* I wih I could help, but you're just gonna be nervous till the day, so good luck (not that you need any)! Anyways, hope everything woks out just fine.

"Love like yuo never been hurt, live like today was the last day and dance like no one is watching."

Love's Addiction
Member
since 2001-06-21
Posts 57
all around you
4 posted 2001-06-21 11:00 PM


this was a good poem. it's the first i've read of ur's so keep it up!

if love wants me, then it can come find me

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

5 posted 2001-06-21 11:44 PM


discribed images were nice...and yea...you shouldnt be nervous at all you should frightened..:saracsm:....hahah but good luck and hope things turn out how youw ant it to ...bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

ethel lahootie
Member
since 2001-03-06
Posts 143
SC, USA
6 posted 2001-06-22 12:17 PM


thank u so much u guys!...with ur words of encouragement(sp?)thanks again...
ethel

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
7 posted 2001-06-22 04:19 PM


Very nicely done. I really thought you did this well.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

ethel lahootie
Member
since 2001-03-06
Posts 143
SC, USA
8 posted 2001-06-22 09:46 PM


gracias dopey!
-ethel-

Shygirl82
Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245
Ilinois
9 posted 2001-06-25 02:21 AM


I thought this was good..you could feel the nervousness within it which was really cute...I am sure things will be just fine though  Good Luck
~Nikki~

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