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Teen Poetry #4
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quietlydying
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2001-06-10
Posts 935
the wonderful land of oz

0 posted 2001-06-10 03:50 AM


an older piece of mine.

The mirror,
shattered,
leaves reminants of
Shiny, Slender Slivers
of glass
blanketing the floor.
Burrowing their way
into my tender flesh, so
ALIVE
it never ceases to bleed.
Venturing to the depths
of the
all too raw
soles
of my naked feet,
which bear the brunt of all.

- jen


© Copyright 2001 jennifer elizabeth - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
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Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2001-06-10 04:11 AM


I will honestly say that I loved this piece. You expressed the pain within this poem extremely well. Wonderful job.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

knightlyshadows
Senior Member
since 2001-04-14
Posts 791
obscured vision
2 posted 2001-06-10 02:20 PM


yea i agree with javier......i liked this piece alot! im glad evy dragged u into joinin us here great work on this poem..and i cant wait to see more!
tiff

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

Where are you when i need you....?

Acies
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Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
3 posted 2001-06-14 10:41 AM


This piece tells a lot.  Very mush heart felt write.  Beautiful write.  keep sharing

hi Sweets, Lizzy, Ina, Erin, Erica, Minna, Kit, Kamie, Javi, Jenn, Sharon, Nan, Cawlee, Cherish, Ashley, Sara, Justine, Leah, Jess, Kimmie, Maree, Mic

the_rescue
Member
since 2001-05-23
Posts 316
Japan
4 posted 2001-06-14 11:39 AM


the poem was really good I like it alot and the imagery rocked

in the silence of the night I hear angels voices singing your name oh how beautiful is your name as they sing over and over.  (SPOKEN)

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

5 posted 2001-06-14 06:08 PM


awesome job on expressing this...i felted it ...great poem...hope to see more... bye

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
6 posted 2001-06-14 09:19 PM


This was really good work. hope to see more
anonymousfemale
Member Elite
since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
7 posted 2002-11-08 11:49 PM


Jeez - holy crap. There is some stunning imagery throughout the piece that really does jolt you back to reality.
Glass - it's a bitch, isn't it?

anonymous penguin

Consider yourself added to the hitlist.

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