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LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

0 posted 2001-05-30 12:47 PM

"Once Upon A Time"

Once upon a time
We walked hand in hand
Smiling as we moved forward
through this desolate land

Once upon a time
My heart felt true joy
As i felt your warm embrace
The darkness seemed to slip away

Once upon a time
Dreaming brought delite
For I could feel your love
Within my dreams each night

Once upon a time
Is all that can be said
For now broken and cast aside
I remain here to remember days gone by
And dream the dreams I had

Once upon a time

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

[This message has been edited by LoneWolf (edited 05-31-2001).]

knightlyshadows
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 791
obscured vision

1 posted 2001-05-30 01:08 PM

i liked how u started each stanza the same way and the overall flow to this, along with the message with it. the last stanza i loved tho! i think you did a great job on this! keep up the good work. *hugs*
tiff

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

Just leave me alone and give me some space.

the_rescue
Member

since 2001-05-23

Posts 316
Japan

2 posted 2001-05-30 01:55 PM

I like it it's really well written and the feelings are expressed well.

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

3 posted 2001-05-31 01:43 AM

Pretty nostalgic (sp).....well done! I really enjoyed this one.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

4 posted 2001-05-31 02:00 AM

as always...this was well written

...i enjoyed it...bye

i'm addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

cherish
Senior Member

since 2001-03-25

Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........

5 posted 2001-05-31 02:03 AM

beautiful poem...once upon a time...*sigh*....i enjoyed it alot..thanks very much for the read...keep posting

"Life is not long and boring,
it's short and compelling." -Javier Agosto-

stace_co2003
Member

since 2001-03-30

Posts 497
In a dream world

6 posted 2001-05-31 10:23 AM

this is really cute. I like it.keep writing!!

Stace

I'm just glad that now this rainstorm has ended, and I can see the rainbow once again.

SEA

Moderator

Member Seraphic

since 2000-01-18

Posts 22676
with you

7 posted 2001-06-02 04:43 AM

yeah...had my once upon a time...it was a nightmare though....now I have my happily ever after

(that is MUCH better)

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

8 posted 2001-06-07 10:33 PM

oyyy do i dare even wanna think about all my "once upon a times??" lets not go there shall we?? lol...loved the poem...wonderfully written!

Suga_Baby
Member

since 2000-08-06

Posts 380
Maine, USA

9 posted 2001-06-07 10:36 PM

I can relate... can't we all!!
nice work

Suga

"A dream is a wish your heart makes while you are fast asleep."

DarkAngelOfTheStars
Member

since 2001-04-21

Posts 255

10 posted 2001-06-07 10:37 PM

loved it

Dont knock on deaths door ...... ring the bell and run......he hates that

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

11 posted 2001-06-07 11:58 PM

I liked this one ALOT.
Great poem, very nicely written.
Something I and MANY others can relate to.

LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

12 posted 2001-06-08 01:20 PM

Thank you all for the replies.

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

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