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knightlyshadows
Senior Member

since 2001-04-14

Posts 791
obscured vision

0 posted 2001-05-13 02:44 PM

i let my guard down
my shield tumbled to the floor
i let my emotions run free
i was no longer the strong one
the person you come to for comfort
i let my feelings come to the surface
and i broke

i cried myself to sleep
sheltered by the walls of my bedroom
hidden where no one could see me
as i let myself break down
and let the tears fall
i let my guard down
and i cried

i woke up the next morning
my heart still aching
tears still wanting to escape my eyes
i raised my guard back up
i put my shield back into its place
i dried the tears from my eyes
and i smiled

“A single choice can build destinies,or destroy them.”

"You say i only hear what i want too..."

MoeRocko
Member

since 2001-04-25

Posts 166
West Virginia

1 posted 2001-05-13 02:47 PM

Great......... I felt like this too before

Castles made of sand slip into Sea eventually...

Why do people remind me of vacuums?

Spice
Senior Member

since 2001-04-13

Posts 1266
Resting in my cardboard box.

2 posted 2001-05-13 10:57 PM

Glad I inspired you. HaHa.
No seriously- This one I liked.
You put to words exactly what I have been feeling lately. Made me feel good to know I wans't the only one. Great Poem.

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-05-13 11:22 PM

great job on this poem..i really liked and enjoyed the reda...thanks for sharing it...

...?

if i die before i wake , i pray the lord my soul will take-"when thugs cry"

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

4 posted 2001-05-16 03:46 AM

I thought the ending was simply wonderful. Great job on this one tiff. I truly enjoyed the read.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

xShUgArHiGhx

Member Elite

since 2000-09-26

Posts 3150
tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs

5 posted 2001-05-17 11:58 AM

I really enjoyed this one, It really reminded me a lot of myself. Great job

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

6 posted 2001-05-17 10:38 PM

I love the stanza structure, how you sort of narrowed down as you went on in each one, ending in a simple last line of "And I (verb)ed.
Also the thoughts and wordings in here, the diction... it's all just marvelous. Very, very nice work Tiffer. You just reminded me that you are capable of being serious, even though you are a

most of the time.

~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day. Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
~Unknown

Acies

Moderator

Member Rara Avis

since 2000-06-07

Posts 7665
Twilight Zone

7 posted 2001-05-22 11:13 AM

excellent read.
you did a really wonderful job on this one

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

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