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Teen Poetry #4
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Terryloveiris_85
Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 61
The middle of nowhere

0 posted 2001-04-24 04:53 PM



A feeling aroused,
upon her dead heart.
What could this be?
This feeling-torn apart?

With a feeling so bold,
she stepped back into our realm.
Into the land of the sick,the murderous,
and the cold,
Just as she left it, she finally sees.

Will this world never change?
This sick and twisted world.
Or will it all become mad,
And finally begin to derange......

© Copyright 2001 Terryloveiris_85 - All Rights Reserved
keoni
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC
1 posted 2001-04-24 05:08 PM


Very cool. I liked this alot. This is the first post I have read by you. Let me give you a late welcome and I hope to see you post more soon.
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

Allan Riverwood
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Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
2 posted 2001-04-24 06:05 PM


Nice job, I did like the last stanza entirely.  
~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day.  Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.  
~Unknown

anonymous albert ?
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-04-24 06:17 PM


this poem had similar things i ask myself
i did relate to this one..
nicely done..keep writng

...?

death is not the greatest loss in life. the greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live. -norman cousins

Heavens Tears
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Senior Member
since 2001-03-15
Posts 677

4 posted 2001-04-24 07:44 PM


We all ask ourselves if things will change, and I think the answer will always be yes, so the question should be, Will it change for the better.  Great read!

*~*Amanda*~*

*If the only place I can live my dreams is in my sleep, then I'll sleep forever!*

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
5 posted 2001-04-24 08:27 PM


I like this!
Thanks for sharing.
Nice job.

--Marie

subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart.

Dopey Dope
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Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
6 posted 2001-04-24 10:47 PM


I really liked this one. thought you did well in expressing it.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Godsend_1
Member
since 2001-04-19
Posts 247
great state of illinois
7 posted 2001-04-25 03:55 AM


i really liked this poem it is sadish but i enjoyed reading it very much this is the first thing i read by you but now i gotta keep my eyes open thank you

ben redshaw the great  

Terryloveiris_85
Member
since 2001-04-23
Posts 61
The middle of nowhere
8 posted 2001-04-25 04:47 PM


Thanks all. I liked writing this.
Iris

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