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Teen Poetry #4
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Deranger
Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498
Somewhere, between here and there

0 posted 2001-04-17 11:38 PM



Roses for Amy (The Evil Version!)

No more grieving for the petals, that lay crushed upon the floor
No more waiting in the rain, bearing red flowers before your door
Amy, you’ve chained me…

And the roses I bore for you, red as the blood I bled for you,
Beneath skies, blue as the tears I shed; you’ve led me to ruin
Took me a while, to see through that smile, but I think you knew-
Exactly what you were doing

Spare me the lies, I can’t believe I wasted all that time
And I used to like the fact, she always on my mind
So Amy, my one and only, please get out of my head
I can’t stand you haunting me, reminding me of blood I shed

You were my benison, but you’ve become my poison
And you went straight to my heart, right when everything fell apart
Dream girl, you came into my world, but you left me in shards
Damn letting anyone go, was never this hard…

I would say you killed me, but I was dead before we met my friend
But thanks for having the decency, to bury me again.
You buried me again…
Thanks for the decency, you buried me,
Thanks a lot!

Spreading insanity, one post at a time

My skull has glowing green eyes

© Copyright 2001 Alexander Crino - All Rights Reserved
DancinQueen
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Senior Member
since 2000-07-29
Posts 1092
Kokomo,IN,USA
1 posted 2001-04-17 11:46 PM


ahhh...you're back   With a boom I might add.great poem here. I liked the end, you buried me..thanks! Almost adds humor to it, good thing because the rest was sad. Great job, i missed your work! Keep posting

*dq

-=We often get hurt when we trust someone we want them to be instead of who they really are=-

~sugarpie313~
Member
since 2000-09-14
Posts 375
Maine, USA
2 posted 2001-04-17 11:55 PM


omg this was so good!! i have to admit, i loved the ending... it gave that that final oommph LOL great job!!!


Valerie

*Life can take your dreams and turn them upside down, Friends will talk about you when you're not around, but don't ever lose that light in your eyes*

Dopey Dope
Deputy Moderator 1 Tour
Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
3 posted 2001-04-18 12:25 PM


AMAZING! I loved this poem. I didn't like the very last line though. "thanks a lot!"
But i liked every words of the whole poem. EVERYTHING was amazing.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
4 posted 2001-04-18 12:28 PM


VERY nice work!!  I loved this!  It's simply outstanding...
I'm glad to see you're back.     And with a piece that's going straight into the library!  Wonderful work, Deranger.  Looking forward to reading more again!

--Marie

subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart.

cherish
Senior Member
since 2001-03-25
Posts 1639
swimming in fairy floss...........
5 posted 2001-04-18 01:44 AM


there's only one word i can think of to describe what went through my head when i read this one:
wow!!
i loved it!

"Life is not long and boring,
it's short and compelling." -Javier Agosto-

AngelShell
Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...
6 posted 2001-04-18 02:16 AM


Hey,

I'm sorry to hear it happened again.
But you were never dead, not to me.

~First they tell you, you can’t sleep alone in a strange place, then they tell you, you can’t sleep with somebody else~

Deranger
Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498
Somewhere, between here and there
7 posted 2001-04-18 09:44 AM


Hey guys,

Thanks for the input.  This piece was written purely for myself, i'm just glad it was able to give something to the reader as well.

Angelshell, well some of us are born dead...quite the paradox, i know...

Spreading insanity, one post at a time

My skull has glowing green eyes

banburycross
Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946
viginia
8 posted 2001-04-18 12:06 PM


i really like this poem!!  the wording was incredible and the emotion was great throughout the piece.  this is really great writing, i look forward to reading more form you.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

Child of the Stars
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Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
9 posted 2001-04-18 03:44 PM


Very nice one here Mister Deranger......heavily heavy....Keep postin aiight? Or I'll just have to beatcha up.  
  ~Carly

There is pleasure in poetic pains which only poets know......~Unknown

Low Man's Lyric
Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 236
In a dream
10 posted 2001-04-18 04:05 PM




Great job with this, I really liked how the whole poem flowed. Until your next poem, bye.


Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first note says "For the woman I love" and the second, "For my best friend."  
~Anonymous

lonely*soul
Member
since 2001-04-05
Posts 396
east haddam (moodus) ct :)
11 posted 2001-04-18 04:37 PM


omg i like this alot...im guessing this amy chick is a ex of yours..anyways... it was an outstanidn poem..i think the first of yours ive read (im kinda new)

         *~KiM~*

" im surrounded by people, but yet im still all alone"

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