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chasing rain
Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 737
Canada

0 posted 2001-06-21 10:44 PM

Crystal eyes, full of lies
And hair made out of gold.
Pure white skin, rounded chin
Ears full of stories told.

Rosy cheeks, she softly speaks
The wind becomes her voice.
Lips of red, but misled
Her mother had no choice.

Striding here, posing there
Her skirts go up in flames.
Child gone, she must live on
Through the beauty games.

==========
I don't like this one...bleh. But anyways...

obscurity of cloud
Member

since 2001-05-11

Posts 294
....:::::******:::::....

1 posted 2001-06-21 10:52 PM

very interesting! i really like the first line extra expecially

Great message, of course.

"so when at times the mob is swayed to carry praise or blame too far, we may choose something like a star" --Frost

Love's Addiction
Member

since 2001-06-21

Posts 57
all around you

2 posted 2001-06-21 10:55 PM

how could u not like this ? i thought it was great! keep it up please!

if love wants me, then it can come find me

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

3 posted 2001-06-22 12:03 PM

there is a lot of meaning behind this poem...made me think about some things...i liked how you wrote it...great poem

...bye Leah

im addicted to passions in poetry!...are you?

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

4 posted 2001-06-22 12:31 PM

After reading through this poem a few times, it left me really thinking about the meaning behind this poem. I really enjoyed this... there's a lot of emotion and power put into this. The flow and rhyme scheme was excellent! Awesome post, Leah. This poem rocks.

--Marie

"Well the sun is slowly sinking down, but the moon is slowly rising... so this old world must still be spinning 'round. And I still love you." -James

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

5 posted 2001-06-22 04:26 PM

This wasn't your best. I didn't like it much. You've written so much better Leah, but it wasn't horrible. I liked the style, there was just something missing.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

chasing rain
Senior Member

since 2001-05-15

Posts 737
Canada

6 posted 2001-06-22 10:34 PM

I know, which is why i didn't like it...

But no matter.

Va pensiero sull' ali dorate...

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