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Teen Poetry #4
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Child of the Stars
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Ann Arbor, MI

0 posted 2001-04-12 10:35 PM


A mother waits, without her son,
Her life is neither there nor gone
She presses on and holds his hands
Her gentle touch needs no command
To let him live, or let him go?
A love as sweet should surely know....


"A monitor, a buzzing noise
Keeps telling us that he's alive
A fading heart, a plastic vein
Is feeding him until he dies
No dirt on walls, no filth on hands
It's just not right for little boys
A flower here, a candy there
And still he sleeps, no time for toys..."

A mother waits, without her son,
Her life is neither there nor gone
And little James is sleeping still
Awaiting his escape...


"I know he thinks without their help,
I feel he feels without their aid
But trapped is he, alone, although
We're here again, we've never strayed
You dream, my James, I dream it too
The nights and days are lined with fear
If you can hear the words I speak,
You'll know that I'm forever near."

A mother waits, without her son,
Her life is neither there nor gone
And little James is sleeping still
Awaiting his escape...



© Copyright 2001 Carly Anne Van Dort - All Rights Reserved
Acies
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Twilight Zone
1 posted 2001-04-12 10:51 PM


Ouch!!! OMG Carly, you are it
you are awesome
i just love your pieces
It actually made me feel really sad
~*standing ovation*~

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Dopey Dope
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San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-04-13 12:00 PM


OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*faints*
This was so amazing Carly!
You are so great Carly!!!!!
CARLY! CARLY!!!!!!!!!!! CARLY!!!!!!!
hahaha...I love this carly, very very awesome poem.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Elizabeth
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3 posted 2001-04-13 12:02 PM


Carly, I can't tell you how much I liked this poem. You've told the story of James and his mother well....now, what happens next?
Attack Ferrit
Junior Member
since 2001-04-09
Posts 41
texas
4 posted 2001-04-13 12:12 PM


well i think i'll agree with everyone else in saying OMG!!!!! that was great. that has to be one of the best poems i have read sence coming here. absolutely amazing.

everything is skin deep

aim: theattackferrit
email: whenferritsattack@hotmail.com

anonymous albert ?
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5 posted 2001-04-13 12:41 PM


WOW!!!...OMG!!!...that was amazin great job! on this carly keep writin...
JBaker515
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Dartmouth College
6 posted 2001-04-13 12:46 PM


Its all been said.
WOW
Jeff

Linc
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The Backstreet Boy
7 posted 2001-04-13 08:06 AM


SUPERB

Hey,

      Like I said superb, I loved reading it. Its going into my library     keep up the superb work    

        -- Linc

"Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment."

[This message has been edited by Linc (edited 04-13-2001).]

LoveBug
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8 posted 2001-04-13 09:46 AM


Oh gosh!!!!

This brought tears to my eyes. This is such a sad piece, but you describe everything so beautifully... A VERY excellent piece, my friend. Thanks for sharing.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

Fading Away
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9 posted 2001-04-13 10:02 AM


Carly.. this is so beautiful.  This brought tears to my eyes.  This is one of the best poems you have ever written.  It's going straight to my library... VERY nicely done!!

--Marie

subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart.

Allan Riverwood
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Winnipeg
10 posted 2001-04-13 03:09 PM


Carly, this is OUTSTANDING!  One of your best poems of all, this is a definite ten out of ten on the Carly scale.     Seriously, it got me in the heart, like only you can.  
Keep up the amazing work, kiddo.  
~Allan

Build a man a fire, and he's warm for a day.  Set a man on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.  
~Unknown

Dana Samples
Member
since 2001-04-07
Posts 68

11 posted 2001-04-13 04:12 PM


Howdie!!!!! Carly that was one of your best!!!!! this is going in or zine girl!!!
Carly you are SOOOOOO AWESOME!!!!! I LOVE YA TO DEATH!!!!! KEEP GOIN GIRL!!!!

LOTS OF LOVE ALWAYS, DANA

Child of the Stars
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12 posted 2001-04-13 04:16 PM


  WOO HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thanks guys, you rock....you really do....and Dana! really? HURRAY!! hehe. Can't wait to see how it comes out yo!!! PEACE OUT KIDS!!!  

There are pleasures in poetic pains that only poets know......~Unknown

IsGona
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since 2000-07-14
Posts 723

13 posted 2001-04-13 06:45 PM


CARLY for president!!!!!!!!!!

Child of the Stars
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14 posted 2001-04-13 06:47 PM


That's what I'm talkin bout.

There are pleasures in poetic pains that only poets know......~Unknown

Spine Grinder
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since 2000-10-28
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Standing In Silence...
15 posted 2001-04-13 08:45 PM


this poem rocked!it brought tears to my eyes
*S*staci

xShUgArHiGhx
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tRyIn tO fIt iN2 mY oWn ShoEs
16 posted 2001-04-15 07:53 PM


This was absolutely amazing!!! So sad tho...very impressive!! keep up the good work =o)
lonely*soul
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since 2001-04-05
Posts 396
east haddam (moodus) ct :)
17 posted 2001-04-15 08:06 PM


wow carly that is an awsome poem..i think its your best yet!!!  brought tears to my eyes...for real!!!!
  poor lil james  
        <3  *~KiM~*

" im surrounded by people, but yet im still all alone"

anonymousfemale
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
18 posted 2001-04-16 12:55 PM



Carly,

This piece was truly brilliant and deserves so many more words than the English language will allow. What you have described has provoked a great amount of sadness in me. To be honest, I have never read a piece that has moved me this much.

Thankyou for such an amazing read.

~AF~

" Your mother's in here with us Karras. Would you like to leave a message? I'll see that she gets it."
The Devil - The Exorcist

anonymousfemale
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
19 posted 2001-04-16 12:56 PM


It might help if the library button is actually clicked next time.

~AF~

" Your mother's in here with us Karras. Would you like to leave a message? I'll see that she gets it."
The Devil - The Exorcist

Ina
Senior Member
since 2000-10-09
Posts 1236
Quebec, Canada
20 posted 2001-04-16 02:49 PM


Holy....haha this was too amazing to even say. Its going in my library...so sad.

Regina

a small cut is only the beggining of a life in pain

Marshalzu
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Lurking
21 posted 2001-04-16 03:35 PM


Wow... OMG... absoloutely amazing... wonderful... I could go on... but mere words cannot express how much I liked this... Well done. I shall be adding it to my Library.
<<_Andrew_>>

" No Army can conquer a galaxy, yet faith alone can overturn the universe."

Morouxshi San
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since 2000-10-11
Posts 207
San Juan, Puerto Rico
22 posted 2001-04-16 09:55 PM


theyve said it all carly.
lovely poem.

San, the wise
San, the dumb
San, the guy...


Low Man's Lyric
Member
since 2001-04-03
Posts 236
In a dream
23 posted 2001-04-16 10:55 PM


Since what im going to say has been said I'll say it again, WOW THIS POEM WAS GREAT!!

Give her two red roses, each with a note. The first note says "For the woman I love" and the second, "For my best friend."  
~Anonymous

banburycross
Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946
viginia
24 posted 2001-04-17 01:05 PM


*shivers*  i'm at a loss for words, this is truly beautiful writing.  definetly one for my library, keep writing beautiful poetry.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

banburycross
Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946
viginia
25 posted 2001-04-17 01:06 PM


see by add this to my library, i meant i was going to add this to my library. oopsies.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

keoni
Senior Member
since 2000-10-16
Posts 850
Up in the mountains in the NFC
26 posted 2001-04-17 01:47 PM


Wow! Really amazing. I don't know what else to say, besides you've heard it all already. It's going in my library right now!
Jon

"Your anger is a gift"-Rage Against The Machine
"Only God can judge me" Tupac Shakur

anonymous albert ?
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27 posted 2001-04-17 01:53 PM


is this gonna be another...
"i don't wanna say goodbye" post ???  

Heavens Tears
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28 posted 2001-04-17 03:03 PM


OMG!  This was truly excellent.  It really hit home.  I loved your repeating verses.

*If the only place I can live my dreams is in my sleep, then I'll sleep forever!*

Child of the Stars
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29 posted 2001-04-17 03:09 PM


We haven't been talking about tuna, so I hope not...Thanks for the replies guys n' gals, means the world to me.   I love you all!!!
  ~Carly

There are pleasures in poetic pains that only poets know......~Unknown

branden726
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Bay City, MI
30 posted 2001-04-17 05:22 PM


*Tears of love*
*Tears of faith*
*Never any Tears of hate*

This is awsome i love it and if there was any....Any kind of like hall of fame...this would be #1 in it GREAT JOB

"i just love when you bring your whole crew because its just a bigger piece of cake for me to chew threw"



anonymous albert ?
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31 posted 2001-04-20 06:14 PM


ey!!!
u knoe wat..
i decided to make this
another"i dont wanna say goodbye" post
whos down?

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