Rain, Tears of Heaven - pipTalk Forums

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banburycross
Senior Member

since 2001-03-27

Posts 946
viginia

0 posted 2001-04-09 08:31 PM

Icy raindrops mix with tears,
to fall on rocks unmoved by grief.
Heaven's sorrow falls softly,
a quiet echo to my silent sobs.

The melancholy symphony of my thoughts
plays for the lonely audience of my mind.

My misery stands at odds with the brook,
gurgling and chuckling with pleasue,
and gaining force beneath my feet.
It tugs at my toes,
and tries to entice me to play.

But my hand strays to the sand beside me,
and the tighter i grasp the grains,
the more slip through my fingers,
like all my unrealized dreams.

I shiver, soaked by my sadness.
On a rock,
near the brook,
I weep with heaven.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

Empty tears
Member

since 2001-03-12

Posts 64

1 posted 2001-04-09 08:34 PM

Wow. this was a great post, full of emotion. i really love this.

Death is but an escape from loneliness

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

2 posted 2001-04-09 08:39 PM

"I shiver, soaked by my sadness.
On a rock,
near the brook,
I weep with heaven."

This poem is so beautiful... the descriptions are superb, and the emotion portrayed is excellent. This is a poem that really shows off the talent that you have and definitely deserves a place of its own in my library..
You're such a talented writer... Keep sharing your creativity with everyone because I'm sure they love it as much as I do.
Very nicely done yet again, babe.

--Marie

"Hope is a thing with feathers that perches in the soul." --Emily Dickinson

[This message has been edited by Fading Away (edited 04-09-2001).]

Dana Samples
Member

since 2001-04-07

Posts 68

3 posted 2001-04-09 08:45 PM

WOW!!! that was great!!! i love rain and have always thought that when it rains that heaven is crying. its good to know that someone feels the same way. keep it up!!

lots of love, dana

Allan Riverwood

Member Elite

since 2001-01-04

Posts 3502
Winnipeg

4 posted 2001-04-09 09:05 PM

I think this was probably the best I have read from you thus far. Very nice job on this, the last line was extremely powerful.

~Allan

The sun was born, so it shall die. ~VNV Nation, "Further"

Dopey Dope

Moderator

Member Patricius

since 2000-08-30

Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico

5 posted 2001-04-09 09:54 PM

wowish! I thought this was amazing. Such sadness within this poem. The last line put the final impact.....BAM...right in my soul. VERY well done!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Linc

Senior Member

since 2001-03-07

Posts 552
The Backstreet Boy

6 posted 2001-04-10 07:48 AM

Hey,

Banburycross or Peter cause you have been her for a wile

this is a great poem maybe even the best of yours I have ever read I think is truly great. What they all said I agree with so I have nothing more today. Until your next masterpiece

-- Linc

"Once you reach your original goal it seems that the journey was your real accomplishment."

Heavens Tears

Senior Member

since 2001-03-15

Posts 677

7 posted 2001-04-10 09:21 AM

Woah! Great job! Full of emotion. I look forward to more of your poems!

*If the only place I can live my dreams is in my sleep, then I'll sleep forever!*

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

8 posted 2001-04-19 08:08 PM

*BUMP*

This deserves to be back up on the first page. I think everyone needs to read this one

subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart.

anonymous albert ?

Member Elite

since 2001-03-23

Posts 2979

9 posted 2001-04-19 08:15 PM

yep...thanks for bringing it back up..i really didn't get to see it the first time.
i read it and i did relate to it, in many ways.great poem and one of ur best poems
thanks for sharing this...keep writing

...?

Starr
Member

since 2001-02-08

Posts 100

10 posted 2001-04-20 03:58 PM

The emotion shown in this poem was great,I think, like everyone, the last line was great(it gave the full impact of the poem). Keep up this great work and keep on posting!

Every action of our lives touches some chord that will vibrate in eternity.

FoxXena
Member

since 2001-06-13

Posts 141
where dragons play, children run free and foxes are never hunted

11 posted 2001-06-19 06:37 PM

*sniffles* how...sad. This is a beautiful, if sad poem...very well done.

*+*Would you be known by everybody? Then you know nobody.~
-Publilus Syrus*+*

Linc

Senior Member

since 2001-03-07

Posts 552
The Backstreet Boy

12 posted 2001-06-20 09:02 AM

Hey,

WAY OLD! haha way way old my birthday old. I am sure the new people want to read such good work though. Until whatever

-- Linc

       "Blood Moon"
   Host: Lark.crodo.com
         Port:1313

Fading Away

Member Elite

since 2001-03-14

Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia

13 posted 2001-06-20 12:02 PM

I know I already replied to this, but seeing as this is my favorite poem by you, I thought I would reply again. The imagery in this piece amazes me even more with each read-through. The way you put your thoughts down is excellent... the poem is beautiful. Your talent is amazing. It's enough to make me jealous... Wonderful work. I hope you come back and keep posting soon. We all miss you around here. Nicely done.

--Marie

"Imagine a pageant...
In my head the flesh seems thicker,
Sandpaper tears corrode the filth,
And I need you now somehow." --Silverchair

LoneWolf
Member

since 2001-03-10

Posts 384
IL

14 posted 2001-06-20 07:33 PM

wow, this was aweso,. i loved it. great job

It's too bad I'm not as wonderful a person as people say I am, because the world could use a few people like that.
I've learned that even when you th

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