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Teen Poetry #4
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AngelShell
Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...

0 posted 2001-04-09 03:19 AM


The following is a true story and dedicated to my ex *shoves her finger down her throat*.

p.s please persevere with it, it does end I promise.

Your girl called me,
Warned me to keep away,
Told me you didn’t care,
Told me she was there to stay.
Would have thought,
You’d call personally,
Or is that she’d readin’ your mail,
She thinks you’re blind you see.
Your girl she loves you,
She’s just a little obsessed,
The word stalker comes to mind,
I think she’s possessed.
I’ll be your girl,
I won’t turn ‘to Linda Blair,
I think she’s quite serious.
Thinks she’s really a scare.

Come to think about it…

Your girl really suits you,
Your quite a fitting pair,
She’s just as screwed up as you,
Screwed up under your hair.
So if you do say goodbye,
I take back my vow,
I won’t be your girl,
You deserve the little cow.
I hope that you’re happy,
In your royal little dream,
Only you won’t be able to wake up,
No one will hear your scream.

Your girl is a nightmare,
Please accept my commiseration,
I hope that you don’t find it too hard,
Putting up with this incarceration,
Your girl is really outstanding,
Were did you find such a specimen,
She probably eats her boyfriends for dinner,
Cuts out their hearts and eats ‘em,
I wouldn’t put it past her,
But it’s your commitment,
I just hope you sign,
A prenuptial agreement.
So see ya later,
I pray for your sanity,
I guess you should have listened to me,
And not your well nurtured vanity.


I just felt like writing this down.  I hope it was little light entertainment.


© Copyright 2001 Michelle - All Rights Reserved
anonymous albert ?
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-23
Posts 2979

1 posted 2001-04-09 05:20 AM


JEESH..that was a long poem from u i mean long compare to mines hehe but i like it nice job  
Child of the Stars
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Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
2 posted 2001-04-09 07:13 AM


  Read the whole thing, and Boo ya! That's all I've got to say to THAT!   Stay tough!
  ~Carly

NOTE TO SELF: Live to love and love to live.

Allan Riverwood
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Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
3 posted 2001-04-09 10:05 AM


I'll second Carly's "Booya."     
This was a great poem, the format was original.  I really like the stand alone line "come to think of it..."  such a well-defined threshold in the poem really accentuates the change in its meaning nicely.  
One thing I didn't like was the rhyming of "specimen" with "eats 'em."  Didn't really work for me, kind of defied the scheme.
Overall I like the theme of it.  
"Your girlfriend sucks... but wait a minute, so do you..."  
haha  
Nice.
~Allan

The sun was born, so it shall die. ~VNV Nation, "Further"

Heavens Tears
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since 2001-03-15
Posts 677

4 posted 2001-04-09 10:26 AM


I am guessing that you dont like this girl!  Good job though.  Keep posting!!

*~*Me*~*

banburycross
Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946
viginia
5 posted 2001-04-09 03:09 PM


Wow, i'm really glad to not be on the recieving end of this one.  great emotion in this piece, you express yourself very well.  keep writing and posting.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
6 posted 2001-04-09 08:07 PM


A wittle cow? A wittle wittle cow?
Mooooooooooooooo

Nicely done....great vent poem. I REALLY REALLY liked this....Go yoU!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

AngelShell
Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...
7 posted 2001-04-10 01:25 AM


Thanks guys I just thought that it would be better to vent though poetry here than on the phone to her.
Although I don't really like her, I'm not up for being on anyone elses hit list just yet...I don't think I'm assassination material to her at the mo, just "I have to keep my eye on her" material.

You guys rock.

orange()alligator
Junior Member
since 2001-02-06
Posts 21

8 posted 2001-04-12 01:17 AM


hey,
lol nice poem, psychotic ex g/f's DO suck! keep writin, i loved the poem.
-bergundy-

Shygirl82
Member
since 2001-02-19
Posts 245
Ilinois
9 posted 2001-04-12 04:22 PM


WOW....I really liked this one
It made me look at my situation very
differently....thanks for sharing
~Nikki~

Fading Away
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since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
10 posted 2001-04-13 11:30 AM


The length was kind of intimidating, but it was worth the read.  I liked this... nice job!

--Marie

subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart.

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