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Teen Poetry #4
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Hallucination
Member
since 2001-03-18
Posts 419


0 posted 2001-03-31 05:56 PM


Standing in the rain,
I here the thunder call me
Raindrops hitting my face,
I close my eyes
As a lightning strikes just behind me.

I’m screaming out your name,
cause I need you so
Can’t reason with the time,
the time that’s standing still
For as long as I’ve longed to be hold.

I need some help, a little room inside my heart
Cause your love is beyond my reach, every night is so dark
So lonely without your warm, wish everything was just like before.
But no matter what, you’re beyond me.

Trying to express,
the way I feel in words
So you’ll understand,
the way I am right here
Please let me release all your hurts.

As true as the stars,
the truly shine from above
There’s no lie to this,
I want you to know right from the start
that you are all I am ever thinking of.

I need some love, the word that sets me free
I’m ready for whatever’s you answer, to lost can’t breathe
So hopeful I can’t think straight, wish the question weren’t to late.
But no matter what, you’re beyond me.

Even if the world changed, change wouldn’t be enough
Not even if I chose the open road, I wouldn’t find the way to your love
your beautiful face is all I can remember, it stopped all my senses
cause this stops the way I feel.

I need some happiness, some caring words from your eyes
Sitting under the bridge singing,  singing songs of love deep inside
The green grass on the other side, keeps putting your picture in my mind.
But no matter what, you’re beyond me.


© Copyright 2001 Brian Eggertsen - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2001-04-01 09:37 PM


Didn't i read a poem similar to this?
Uh......well anyway, I liked this one a lot!
It really connected with me.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Child of the Stars
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Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
2 posted 2001-04-03 10:08 AM


   DUDE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS kicked some SERIOUS butt. Yep. Sure did.
  ~Carly

Many miles behind my eyelashes, there always seems to be
the strangest things, the slightly sane, that only I can see...

Marshalzu
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Member Elite
since 2001-02-15
Posts 2681
Lurking
3 posted 2001-04-03 03:55 PM


This is great thanx for sharing.
Andrew.

" No Army can conquer a galaxy, yet faith alone can overturn the universe."

Elvenblood
Member
since 2001-02-17
Posts 409
Maine, USA
4 posted 2001-04-03 06:31 PM


   I agree with Carly! This one RULES!  But realy it's sad!  Best of luck to you my friend.

No angels in heaven nor demons below the sea, could ever dissever my soul from the soul of the beautiful Annabel Lee

Acies
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
5 posted 2001-04-12 11:18 PM


Outstanding expression of your feelings and emotions.  Keep it up. can't wait to see more of your work

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

Attack Ferrit
Junior Member
since 2001-04-09
Posts 41
texas
6 posted 2001-04-12 11:40 PM


wow, that must have been quite a catharsis to write. really great poem. lots of emotion.

everything is skin deep

aim: theattackferrit
email: whenferritsattack@hotmail.com

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
7 posted 2001-04-13 10:57 AM


This is so well written.  Very beautiful piece.. The way you expressed your emotions here was excellent.  Wonderful job.

--Marie

subconsciously, i think i can eat so much to make my stomach hurt, instead of my heart.

banburycross
Senior Member
since 2001-03-27
Posts 946
viginia
8 posted 2001-04-13 11:55 AM


This ia really great writing, the emotion is realy beautiful in this.  keep posting your work.

Sometimes, the things that go unsaid are the only things worth hearing.

Heavens Tears
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Posts 677

9 posted 2001-04-13 03:06 PM


I loved your poem.  It is going in the library.  Some poems really click with me for some reason.  I guess I just like a certain type, and this is one of them.

*If the only place I can live my dreams is in my sleep, then I'll sleep forever!*

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