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Teen Poetry #4
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Deranger
Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498
Somewhere, between here and there

0 posted 2001-03-24 03:56 AM



Chained and forever bonded to pain,
Amidst all my misery – Amidst all my shame,
Come down and do something with me – anything for a minute of your
company
But no, you don’t see me; remember the nickel arcade?

A shame you’re not here, to see what I’ve become,
Some are terrified: those who know me best; others just wonder what’s with the
unrest
That churns deep inside my soul; what passions burn buried inside my heart,
And for what things do I yearn; wanna learn enough to never be like you,

Do you remember?
Don’t you remember?
Do you even remember my name?
Off with his head! Off with his head!
You don’t even remember my name!

Normalcy denied, by the sins of my father exercise,
A hold on my life until I die, and until-
I die.
I knew you never told a single lie! Because-
Everything was a lie.

And where is this, forgiveness?
Maybe, I suppose, we could dispose of this foolishness
After all, we are all adults, adult choices so clear to me,
Apart from paternal responsibility…
And what is this, forgiveness?

Off with his head! Off with his head!
You don’t even remember my name!
Off with his head! Off with his head!
You don’t even remember my name!

[This message has been edited by Deranger (edited 03-24-2001).]

© Copyright 2001 Alexander Crino - All Rights Reserved
AngelShell
Member
since 2000-03-01
Posts 446
not heaven nor hell so...
1 posted 2001-03-24 06:27 AM


*clap clap clap*
Always one for a powerfull return aren't we...
If only your life could mirror the insanity of your poetry's sacrificial intention...


Child of the Stars
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Senior Member
since 2000-09-07
Posts 1658
Ann Arbor, MI
2 posted 2001-03-24 09:29 AM


YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!YOU!!!!!!!!!!!WHERE'D YOU GO???????!!!!!!!!!!?????????!!!!!!!!!!!
nice poem.
~Carly

"The eye sees a thing more clearly in dreams than the imagination awake."
- Leonardo da Vinci

Fading Away
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Member Elite
since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
3 posted 2001-03-24 10:15 AM


I like this poem... It's an interesting style. I liked that. I liked the way you used the bold text... it really adds to the poem. Nice job.

--Marie

I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am.

Allan Riverwood
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Member Elite
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
4 posted 2001-03-24 01:31 PM


Yeah, good use of HTML.
I liked the repititions in the last line... you made an interesting and unique format here. I think this is wonderfully creative.
Great job. Hope to see you around more.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort


Lakewalker
Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289
On the streets w/ people
5 posted 2001-03-24 04:00 PM


I liked the creativeness of the style too, and the poem is good as well

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle"
"Life's short. If you don't look around once in a while you might miss it."
BothUnknown

Deranger
Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498
Somewhere, between here and there
6 posted 2001-03-25 02:16 AM


I thank you guys, for the complements. This poem (if it's not obvious) is about my father that i haven't seen for...um...a long time, i'm pretty sure he remembers my name, but it's the poet's job to exaggerate.

Spreading insanity, one post at a time


Dopey Dope
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Moderator
Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
7 posted 2001-03-25 03:30 PM


This poem has a few lines that are exactly like paranoid android by Radiohead....anyway it's nice to see you back deranger.


I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Deranger
Member
since 2000-05-10
Posts 498
Somewhere, between here and there
8 posted 2001-03-25 03:33 PM


I know. But old words applied in new contexts become new words, no?

Spreading insanity, one post at a time


Acies
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Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
9 posted 2001-04-01 06:39 PM


I love your style and your creativity.  You have a way with putting words into wonderful meaningful lines.  keep it up

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

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