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Teen Poetry #4
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Marshalzu
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0 posted 2001-03-21 02:22 PM


Character assassination,
The gun is aimed at me,
What's my fascination,
With this poetry?
I feel the bullets whiz by,
And bounce of harmlessly,
Don't think that I will cry,
Because I'm quite happy,
You've hit me in the heart before,
And I just bounced right back,
I'm used to all the blood and gore,
And I know my heart is black,
Shoot me with your harsh mail,
Fill me with your hate,
I hear bullets rattling like hail,
And I just accept my fate,
Character assassination,
You shoot me in the heart,
What's your fascination,
With tearing me apart?

I am still wondering why my ex-girlfreind sent the poetry I sent her to everyone in her mailing list, she tired to humilate me with the things I am most proud of... mind you I suppose it's one way of getting more exposure.
Zu

Love is a friendship caught on fire.

© Copyright 2001 Andrew Sewell - All Rights Reserved
Dopey Dope
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San Juan, Puerto Rico
1 posted 2001-03-21 03:01 PM


This was awesome. I loved this one......and geesh your X is mean as heck!!!!! Anyhow, I see no reason why you'd be humiliated. Your poems are amazing.

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Allan Riverwood
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Winnipeg
2 posted 2001-03-21 05:22 PM


This flowed marvelously. You have a talent for writing poetry that runs very well through, and has a great format. I admire that in you.
And about the footnote? I also admire your optimism.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort


LoveBug
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3 posted 2001-03-21 08:08 PM


This is a wonderfully written poem, my friend. It's funny, the ways that people try to hurt us. I'm glad that you are able to bounce back, as you say. Thanks for sharing.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

Fading Away
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4 posted 2001-03-22 09:25 AM


It's a good thing that you can look at the good side of someone trying to get the worst of you.
Anyway, great poem. I like this a lot... Thank you for sharing.

--Marie

I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am.

anonymousfemale
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since 2000-02-02
Posts 2797
Limbo
5 posted 2001-03-22 09:42 AM


Every time I read your critique message I laugh.

Now the poem. Very good. Your ex sounds like a bit of a pyscho. Tip from anony: find a hammer and her toes.
Don't do that...the police will get involved and strip searches and lines of angry convicts.
Ignore the little girl instead. Exposure is nothing but good. You deserve it for you write so well. OK..sugar sinking in.

~AF~

"It is not necessary to change. Survival is not mandatory."
-W. Edwards Deming

Acies
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Member Rara Avis
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Twilight Zone
6 posted 2001-03-30 02:32 PM


Excellent piece if I may say
you've done really well
and don't let her get your down
thanks for the read

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

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