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Teen Poetry #4
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fozzyozzy
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since 2001-03-15
Posts 336
Lessburg Virginia

0 posted 2001-03-17 12:22 PM


A Nail

A nail plunged and hammered
Driven in alone
A nail no life of its own
Not to bind books
To close up windows and shelters
Not representing love's looks
Used to bind what is already strong
Meant to stay for long
It splinters and cracks the mood
To bind together or split apart
Driven nail not through wood
But through my heart

-------------------------------



© Copyright 2001 Sean Michael DeFlora - All Rights Reserved
Allan Riverwood
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since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502
Winnipeg
1 posted 2001-03-17 01:07 AM


Good job. This was a quick read, and was worth it. I like the theme to it... and the last line was neat.
Well done.
~Allan

If I had your eyes, I'd be blind. For I can only see out of my own. ~~Carly Van Dort


Dopey Dope
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Member Patricius
since 2000-08-30
Posts 11132
San Juan, Puerto Rico
2 posted 2001-03-17 12:36 PM


I thought it was well written. The last line left an impact upon the reader, at least me.
Very nicely done!

I was born myself, raised myself, and will continue to be myself. The world will just have to adjust.

I'm in love with my shadow
I admire it daily

Fading Away
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since 2001-03-14
Posts 3131
Lynchburg, Virginia
3 posted 2001-03-17 03:57 PM


"Driven nail not through wood
But through my heart"

VERY beautiful poem. Well thought-out, it seems. Nice job.

--Marie

I never thought that you would ever be the one to let me down. I guess that just goes to show how wrong I always am.

Acies
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Member Rara Avis
since 2000-06-07
Posts 7665
Twilight Zone
4 posted 2001-03-22 05:58 PM


I like it
that was a really good one
i see a lot of talent in you
keep writing and i'll keep reading
thanks for the share

"So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this give life to thee." W.S.

LoveBug
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since 2000-01-08
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5 posted 2001-03-22 06:03 PM


Great symbolism here, my friend. Wonderful description, and great portrayal of emotions. Thanks for sharing.

"Men judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, for everyone can see and few can feel."-Machiavelli

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